Trained to love

by dedpoet 13 Replies latest jw friends

  • dedpoet
    dedpoet

    I came across this section in the pay attention book just now, about how to welcome newcomers to jw meetings. It seems that the wts think that jws aren't naturally loving, welcoming people, and have to be constantly reminded to extend a welcome to visitors to their meetings.

    Newly associated ones are especially in need of attention.

    When they first come to the Kingdom Hall, new ones
    may feel like strangers; we want to change that feeling to
    one of warm friendship.

    If you notice a new one standing by himself or talking
    only with the one who studies with him, take the initiative
    to approach and greet him and introduce him to others.

    Teach attendants to greet new ones, and occasionally
    remind them to do this.


    Train all the brothers and sisters to take the initiative
    in approaching new ones and getting acquainted with
    them.

    So that you may encourage and help others, be sure
    to arrive at the meetings early and stay for a while
    after the program.

    You can associate with new ones at other times also,
    perhaps visiting with them in their home or yours.

    Such personal interest lets them see that genuine
    love exists among Jehovah's people. (John 13:35)

    It also fills the void created when they cut off
    former associations and worldly entertainment.

    I was an attendant on many occasions myself, and do recall being reminded by the elders, who bearing in mind which publication this is in, would be responsible for providing this "training", that attendants were required to be welcoming to any new ones who came to the meeting. Personally, I never felt the need for such training, I tended to welcome everyone to the kh whether I knew them or not, but obviously some jws did need to be reminded of how to be nice people, in case they had forgotten. Some of the leading love bombers at our hall certainly exhibited very differrent behaviour outside the meetings, being harsh and cruel to their wives and families, like a guy who would almost become your best friend if he met you at the kh, but belittled his wife at every opportunity away from it. They are both still jws, so I guess he still does that.

    I've known people who were impressed, and even almost overwhelmed, by the welcome they received the first time they visited a kh. I must admit I enjoyed what at the time I perceived to be a genuine, loving welcome the first time I attended. I wonder how I, or other first - time visitors, would have felt if we'd have known that the welcome we received wasn't altogether natural, just the dubs carrying out yet another set of wts instructions. They weren't welcoming us because they wanted to, but because they had been ordered to.

    dedpoet

  • Crumpet
    Crumpet

    Hi trev - excellent comment!

    It seems that the wts think that jws aren't naturally loving, welcoming people, and have to be constantly reminded to extend a welcome to visitors to their meetings.

    Thats the thing - you aren't left to just let you natural friendliness and warmth exhibit itself in a genuine way - you are pretty much pressganged into it.

    By the way I was interested to know what it was like at your friends christian baptism that you and Linda were going to go to? Has she posted about that? What were "normal" Christians like? Could you detect a difference between their reactions to you both and the dubs reaction to newbies?

    (I must add that the young sisters in my congo needed no encouragement whatsoever to meet and greet anyone resembling a new single brother between the ages of 12 and 75 at our congregation - they were lucky to get out of their without an engagement ring - reminded me of the what it was like when the angels turned up at Lots and the mob gathered outside in Sodom for the new meat!) LOL!

  • carla
    carla

    Did you add this part?---

    It also fills the void created when they cut off
    former associations and worldly entertainment.

  • dedpoet
    dedpoet
    Did you add this part?---

    It also fills the void created when they cut off
    former associations and worldly entertainment.

    No Carla, it was already there. The book itself can be viewed on this link

    http://www.dbhome.dk/carlo/

    Look on page 22, that's where it is.

  • dedpoet
    dedpoet

    By the way I was interested to know what it was like at your friends christian baptism that you and Linda were going to go to? Has she posted about that? What were "normal" Christians like? Could you detect a difference between their reactions to you both and the dubs reaction to newbies?

    Marion posted about it herself, Crumpet. Her alias is iamfreenow.

    I found the actual meeting very boring, but the welcome seemed genuine, the smiles weren't forced, and there was a feeling of joy in that church that I never experienced at any kh, and I'm an atheist! I guess those people didn't need any training on how to welcome visitors and show love, it comes naturally to them.

  • carla
    carla

    Thanks. I actually downloaded the book already but have not read it. My jw refuses to believe it is real. He being only a r&f is unaware of the elders book and of course all the nasty apostates probably just made it up. He won't ask an elder about either. Not sure if he thinks it would be rude or apostate in nature. How else would he even know about the book if not for apostates and his evil unbelieving wife?

  • juni
    juni

    Very good point dedpoet!

    Such personal interest lets them see that genuine
    love exists among Jehovah's people. (John 13:35)

    I laughed when reading these words after telling people what they should be doing! What a crock of kaka.

    Juni

  • blondie
    blondie

    newly associated or new ones

    TRANSLATION: unbaptized people

    Once you are baptized you are dropped like a hot potato and ignored...

  • LoverOfTruth
    LoverOfTruth

    Many of those Individuals who are Most Loving Evenutally Leave after they've seen "Hate" promoted by this Organization.

  • Sailin
    Sailin

    I just had to join in on this discussion, so being a new poster, I hope I get all this right.

    I grew up in the JW and have faded out after a divorce, and the subsequent non aproval of the members of the congregation, even though it was the ex that was reproved for her affairs.

    The one scripture that has always stuck in my mind is John 13:35...By this all will know that you are my disciples, if you have love amoung yourselves.

    The very fact that the elders have to be told to tell the brothers to make an appearance of a loving group is indication alone that this is not the true religion.

    If the elders make an error in a judicial discision and they are in jepordy of having this revealed, you really get to see the love in the organization. They will push you out of the org. as fast as they can. In fact though, it was likely the most loving thing they ever did as I am free of it now.

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