Obituary January 13, 2095
John McDonald 1990-2095
The last known Jehovah's Witness died today, of natural causes at his home in Brooklyn NY. He survived by three children, six grandchildren and two great grand-children. While few people in this modern day and age remember the once aggressive Christian sect, of Jehovah's Witnesses, Mr. McDonald was raised in a time of both their largest numbers and quickest downfall. He was baptized at the age of 17, at a District Convention of 8,000 people and yet as a sign of the time, was the only one to be baptized at that Convention. The Witness religion had began to unravel, with new teachings of Bible prophesies coming to completion, that were to be the signs of the immediate end, with years following and no end in sight.
By 2016, Mr McDonald stated that his congregation went from 150 publishers attending at his time of baptism to just a half dozen attending on any given meeting night. He stated in his book, "The last of a dying faithful," that he felt that Satan was truly winning and he would hold on to the end, even if it did not happen before his own death, Many wondered, if he did this because of faith or simply because of no other known options. Which was common to the Witness faith, throughout it's active history. By 2018, the Watchtower Society was forced to close over 50% of it's Kingdom Halls, due to lack of funding and attendance and many others were forced to rent theirs out to local events to make ends meet. Something that did not go over well for many faithful left in the religion. Especially in Chicago in 2021 when a Kingdom Hall was used as a nightclub and strip bar for three months, without elders of the local congregation knowing. Again, in Mr McDonald's book he stated in a Chapter entitled, "Babylon in our home", he mentioned his uncomfortable feelings with the Governing Body to not check on who was renting the halls and why. Although, to the end, he never publicly declared any ill will or true negative feelings towards the Governing Body, even when they appointed a woman to their position in 2035 from lack of enough men attending anymore.
By 2041 when the Witnesses were down to just 50 congregation left worldwide and an average age of 65 attended, Mr McDonald was still out in field service once a week. He mentioned how no one ever came to go with him anymore, and he had to print Watchtowers from before 2025 himself, he still preached the message from door to door. You see, after 2025, the Watchtower rights were sold to a local printing firm who used the name for advertising benefits and soon you would read about Jesus history, next to an ad for Pepsi. Soon it went from bad to worse, when the new publisher of the Watchtower tried to resurrect a dying title with a new series on, "Sexy woman of sin," in which for the first time in 2028 a full nude center fold was placed in it's pages. Most people don't even realize this magazine name today, for it's Christian publication history, as it is now sold behind the counter as a nudity magazine called, "Watchtower, proclaiming the beauty of sex."
Mr McDonald was known as the last Witness from 2045 on. When there was no longer a record keeping of those attending. Although a Mrs Tina Burns in Kentucky also claimed the title, until her death two years before Mr McDonald, it was later learned she was never baptized as a Witness and actually attended a Catholic Church every Sunday to her death. Mr McDonald's passing is a page out of a long ago history, and soon many people will not even know the name Jehovah's Witness anymore with his death. Although, as the Pope stated in 2070, she felt that many religions in time do change and like the Witnesses, even the Catholic church itself may soon find it's roles down to near record lows in time.
Mr McDonald will be buried at noon Saturday, and services will be handled by a his children in a traditional Witness ceremony. Although, at the time of this publishing, his son was quoted to say, "Was it really this boring", and might end up just reading a poem instead. Mr McDonalds final words were, "Why so long ... "