This post is an attempt to explain the paradoxical return of ex-JWs back to the Watchtower. My premise is that a person’s unconscious mind has a positive intent in leading them back to the former environment and the intent is of intrinsic value within individuals.
Developmental psychology tells us there are six primary developmental stages in a person’s life. If a person experiences developmental gaps or underdevelopment of a stage all the others that follow will not develop properly and these will be affected.
These are as follows:
Safety 0-12 months
In this stage the person is trying to determine whether he, is safe in this environment. This is pre-cognitive and is totally based on feelings and the senses. If the parents feel insecurities the child will be also affected by the symbiotic relationship that exists within this triad. This first stage is a critical primal stage that will either develop properly or it won’t. If it doesn’t, in adulthood the person has a pervasive fear and it will manifest itself in different ways. One way is the need to belong to a group, or the need to be in a relationship regardless of how flawed it may be.
Individuation 12-24 months
This has often been referred to as the terrible twos stage. In this stage the child discovers that he is an entity apart from the triad and instinctively tests his limits or boundaries. He discovers one word that gives him power over his caregivers, that word is “no”. One generalization I will make is that people, who have difficulty-saying no, did not properly individuate. The consequence of this as it relates to this topic is, the person may not feel a deep congruency at saying “no” to a flawed theology. They may rationalize their return in all kinds of interesting ways; to them it’s their subjective truth.
Object constancy 24-48 months
This is the stage where the intellect is being developed through the billions upon billions of distinctions in the use of the senses. The life guiding maps of experience are built in this stage. Researchers tell us that in this stage the brain will grow more than in all the other years combined. If we consider the lifestyle of JWs and how they raise their children within a sub cultural bubble, we can see the impoverished minds of adult JWs.
Magical thinking 5-6 years
In this stage everything is magical to a child. The child asks a myriad of simplistic questions because to him everything is interesting. The paradises as well as gruesome Armageddon images are deeply imprinted in the psyche and the mind of the child. Persons sometimes stay stuck in this stage and this can be detected by their false hope of things changing without doing anything different to make the change happen. If you go to a JW meeting you hear a lot of magical thinking comments that are not based on reality.
Socialization 6-12 years
This is the stage the child learns to develop life guiding interactive social skills. Most JW children lack the skills to interact in healthy ways to non-JW kids. At this late stage they have been filled with taboo beliefs about being different thus creating a social barrier. This is very detrimental to person should they ever leave the JWs. They often find themselves alienated from others due to their inability to connect with others. We can understand the strong inner pressure to return to the familiar JW environment than to risk growing and discovering one’s true nature, if a person is not properly developed in this area. I have met several JWs that could not function independently of their subculture due to the lack of social skills. The feeling of alienation overrode their logic of the flawed theology. In my opinion these people are better off within the tribal confines of their preferred congregation. They have not yet evolved to be self-sufficient independently searching for their life mission or exploring the magic of life.
Individuation teenage years
The individuation phase starts all over again. At present the JWs are experiencing losses due to their adolescents not conforming to archaic teachings. In our modern world with information being so readily available from numerous sources, the Watchtower will continue to lose members.
Victor Escalante