Oh Freddie.... meowww (Are Cats for Christians?) (page 2)

treeny

Hi Stacey, Nice to meet you. I am new here. Loved this . A friend of mine sent it to me a while back. Woah!! I have a fornicater in my house. Is he still a sinner if he's neutered?? LOL.
terry

slipnslidemaster

It actually seems that the article is written at too high a reading level. It also doesn't have enough vague scriptures in it. Finally, it is a little too long.

Obviously a fake. The Writing committee isn't allowed to write that well.

Slipnslidemaster: "Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety."

- Ben Franklin

Eman, one of our cats (the one I use for my pic, in fact) usually gives a blanket a damn good humping before he will settle down and sleep on it. Can be disconcerting when YOU'RE under that blanket! LOL (He usually gets a swift kick, under those circumstances!)

outsider_looking_in

Freds selling razors now

Stephanus

That's too good looking to be Fred!

Robdar

My cats are all good Christian cats, except for the Persian who is a Muslim. They want to know if this means that they are all little bastards since they were born out of wedlock. Could anybody please enlighten my cats who are very concerned about their social status?

Thanks,
Robdar

Stephanus

want to know if this means that they are all little bastards since they were born out of wedlock.

My wife always gets upset when I call the cats that for that very reason.

siveld

My response to the CATS article:

I humbly accept the admonishment which you have so
thoughtfully provided to us who have mistakenly allowed one of these demonic
creatures to infiltrate our lives.

To think of the number of times I have put off my diligent pre-study of the
Watchtower because my cat was on my lap and I did not want to disturb him in
order to get the magazines in order to partake of their spiritual feasts.

Surely Satan has used these contemptible creatures in many similar ways to
affect the preaching work also; how many pioneers have cut short a long day
of faithful field service with the excuse "oh I have to get home to feed the
cat".

No doubt the society will shortly be updating and reprinting it's entire
catalogue of spiritual food in order to erase all drawings and photographs
which depict these dastardly servants of Satan, namely the lions which can
be seen being hugged by innocent children in the new system.

All faithful servants of Jehovah will doubtless be inspired to dispose of
all their old literature and purchase the new! There will most likely be a
call for new ones to go to Bethel to assist in the work involved.

Surely Jehovah works in humbling and mysterious ways; this new light will
surely inspire many to greater devotion. I can even envisage Christian
congregations disposing of their felines in a mass sacrifice at the back of
their Kingdom Halls; joyfully tossing the horrid creatures into drums of
lighted paper and kero as they loudly sing Kingdom songs in praise of their
fearless creator.

Jehovah would surely also smile upon the new public talk outlines which are
surely in the pipeline, reminding the brothers and sisters that certain
common expressions are no longer acceptable to loyal Christians. These will
doubtless include the following:

- "cat got your tongue?";
- "missed it by a whisker";
- "the cat's out of the bag", and
- "been getting any pussy?".

Perhaps the carcasses of the slaughtered felines could be shipped en masse
to Brooklyn; this would no doubt delight the brothers on the Governing Body
as an expression of the devotion of their faithful followers.

Gotta go now; the cat's at the door and I've got to let him in.

Catch ya

Dave