So there's this girl...

by Anony-Mouse 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • Anony-Mouse
    Anony-Mouse

    So what if I'm 16? Almost 17!

    Anyways...

    There's this girl at our congregation. I thought she was cute and all...but one day she actually comes up and talks to me.

    I'm a shy person at the meetings, but once you get to know me, I'm plenty fun :P .

    So it struck me as odd.

    So we talk and all, it was enjoyable.

    And so thusly, I had my first crush.

    This week, so volunteers to help us move. I, of course, think that she wants to be near me (why else? :P ). She even complemented my shoes that night!

    Tonight at the meeting, she talks to me again. She initiated conversation and all. Just small talk, but I'm all excited cuz I'm a dorky little kid :P . But she is going to give me a music CD...that's as good sign methinks.

    The problems are: I'm not aware of her status as a JW, meaning in or out. The music CD apparently has some bad language, she asked me if I was bothered by it. That means she isn't either. I'm mainly scared that if anything happens, she'd stick with the religion and tear my heart out.

    And then there's the fact that she's 2 years younger than I am...while that doesn't bother me SO much (adult's age's vary all the time), I'm young. It's more important around this age.





    I wouldn't mind a female freind, it's good practice getting used to the gender :P .

  • sass_my_frass
    sass_my_frass

    Unmarried at 14? What's wrong with her?

  • JWdaughter
    JWdaughter

    She is a great person to have for a friend. I wouldn't reveal too much to any girl that age (about your faith etc) My best friend at that age reported to her elder dad when I informed her of my rape. My mom hadn't felt it necessary to tell anyone but the police. In any case, she is too YOUNG for a boyfriend. 14/15 year old girls don't need boyfriends. A nice guy friend, not intense is great, but she isn't ready for more, and you really don't want to go there when you are getting out anyway. Think of the complications of an underage girl,a close relationship with a known unbeliever (which you could well be soon, if not already) and really pissed off parents who are convinced you are out to ruin their little girl. Even if nothing happens, they will assume the worst, and she could be hurt by that as much as you. If you have a circle of friends, and she is part of it, be friends. I wouldn't go any further until you are both adults (especially till she is!).

    I will give this disclaimer-I am the mother of a 15 yo girl and an 18 year old son. I have seen this drama from a few different angles. Nothing needs to happen for parents to freak out at the idea that something might have.

    Shelly

  • darth frosty
    darth frosty

    Talk to her. listen to her stories and tales. Find out the type of person she is and let her know the type of man you plan to be. Search out her true feeling's about the 'truth', hint at your's. I will now give you some advise an elder gave to me (alas with the J-dub blinders on I couldn't understand it at the time) talk to and date as many girls as you can. Develope multiple friendships and grow in knowledge and understanding.

    Have fun young man and live life to the fullest.

  • La Capra
    La Capra

    It's easy for us to say this on this side of our twenties, but the high school years are for getting your heart ripped out. Some of the most tender memories that I visit are those surrounding those teen-aged crushes and romances. Nothing unusual to worry about here. Listen to your heart and live it-at least for now.

    Shoshana

  • diamondblue1974
    diamondblue1974
    I wouldn't mind a female freind, it's good practice getting used to the gender :P .

    Precisely...and if something else develops then cool - go with your heart and do what comes naturally.

    The trouble with JWs is that they are not allowed to follow their heart; its treacherous you see, in reality though what they realise is that when people do follow their hearts, quite often their actions fall outside of what the organisation dictates and they cant run the risk of their members showing their emotion.

    Again chill out, do what comes naturally and enjoy!

    DB74

  • smellsgood
    smellsgood

    Pretty sure she likes you :) Particularly if she doesn't approach many other boys that you can see.

    14 is young, so is 16. Just have fun having a friend for now. It's always awesome when you get on well with someone else.

    She might just be a bit of a rulebreaker if she's listening to music with a little colour in it. Perhaps she would be open to finding out what you have at some point :)

    For now just have some fun. But yeah, probably she does like you

  • jgnat
    jgnat

    It's only the JW weirdness that assumes a fourteen year old girl is looking for a marriage-mate. Enjoy her friendship for what it is. This is PRACTICE for LATER.

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