SHUNNING: How did you feel after your 1st? (page 2)

damselfly

I laughed!

I was working as a cashier at a grocery store, had a huge line of people. The (apparently blind) witness had her heaped cart half unloaded on the belt before she looked up and made eye contact with me. I smiled, she did not. :D You never saw gorceries get flung around so quickly as she threw everything back into her cart and fled the area!

Do apostate's have the ability to demonize groceries? *ponders*

Dams

RichieRich

I felt so empowered.

When people looked at me, they were looking at me wondering what happened. And I knew that if and when they found the answer, they'd be educated.

A few nights ago, myself and a BEAUTIFUL young lady were out to dinner. In walked a young brother I used to know quite well, who had gested with me in times past that the only reason he would the JWs would be to find a good looking wife (shallow I know). Sure enough, he was accompanied by a group of witnesses which mostly comprised of some of the most horrid faces known to man. They all looked at me, her, me. And I nodded.

Then the young lady asked me who they were. I explained. She was so "moved with pity", that as we left the resteraunt, she proceeded to do some very naughty, very embarassing things right in front of the group of kids!

I wasn't complaining.

Oh, back to shunning: It's all what you make of it. Don't see it as YOUR fault. THEY are the ones who can't talk to YOU.

Calliope

i revel in it!!!

of course i've only had 2 experiences thus far, but they were both good friends of mine back in the wit days.

cal.

restrangled

Let me just say that if you are still under parents rule and get shunned it takes NERVES OF STEEL, to maintain your sanity. It is not a pleasant prospect to have to keep showing up in the midst of people that feel you are sub-human and won't look at or talk to you. .....Granted you are talked about behind your back. When this happened to me, I went into such deep depression, and the only thing that saved my hide was the series "Roots" I totally identified with the slaves, feeling the like the subhumans they were treated like.

When it happens the second time, as and adult and it is by a parent, suggested by a visiting CO all it does is Pi** you off/creates anger, frustration and finally pushes you into the realization this is a cult.

r.

esw1966

My sister and her elder husband shunned me at my 'not jw' grandmother's funeral. It did hurt. I wasn't sure how to deal with it. It made me sad and then angry. Then my 'not jw' family stood up for me and began helping me to cope and they were all disappointed with the two of them.

I have moved OUT of the STATE of Wisconsin, my home for 39 years, because I do not think I could do well in that type of an environment. I am in Washington and I LOVE it!

It is so wonderful not thinking that at any moment I could run into someone who will ignore me for not agreeing with them. It is a clean slate. Much needed!

Now, I write emails to my sister and letters to my father trying to get them to weaken their stand on shunning. I do not see it as my problem, but theirs. It hurts them more than it does me from this distance.

I do not think they want to do it, but they feel they must. Therefore, it must hurt their psyche more than mine. If they are still jw clones then I don't want to be around them. If they are not free to be themselves then they are not someone I would seek in a relationship.

I love them, but I wait for them and try to encourage them through letters. When they are more grown up and thinking for themselves I will welcome them WHOLEHEARTEDLY! I give them little hope...

BlackSwan of Memphis

It is so wonderful not thinking that at any moment I could run into someone who will ignore me for not agreeing with them. It is a clean slate. Much needed!

This was something that really bothered me for the first several months after I wrote my da letter. I dreaded running into someone and being shunned. I was told by many that it does get easier, and they were absolutely right. Now, over the last month or two I've been shunned again by friends from the hall and it was fine. One person I saw them looking scornfully at me and I just shook my head at them and shrugged and went along my way.

I do not think they want to do it, but they feel they must. Therefore, it must hurt their psyche more than mine. If they are still jw clones then I don't want to be around them. If they are not free to be themselves then they are not someone I would seek in a relationship.

True, but I've seen here that some jw's sort of bend the rules when they want. I think they really believe that if they shun us then we'll see the error or our ways and return. Interestingly, when my husband ran into my brother the other day my husband asked him if it feels natural to do what he's doing, does it feel right, My brother thought about it for a moment then said, "no it doesn't" and couldn't say anything else.

parakeet

***Well, I have children. They are the love of my life. I will love them forever unreservedly.***

Like you, I was never DFed or DAed. I knew the JWs did not have truth when my son was an infant; I took one look into his little face and knew instantly with a conviction I never felt for any JW doctrine that if he ever needed a blood transfusion, I would be first in line to donate. It took me several more years, but I finally managed a successful fade.

Only rarely do I bump into JWs I used to know -- some shun, some don't. The first time it happened, it was a sister I never had much liked. When she saw me, she threw her head back and looked down her nose at me for a second before turning away. She looked so silly that I laughed in her face. I never had much trouble with shunners after that.

greendawn

I never really experienced this form of JW punishment but I can see how cruel and unchristian it is when it involves family members it's hard to imagine why families allowed themselves to be split like that.

The GB says that's for their own good to bring them back to the org and salvation but that's exactly what the popes were saying during the middle ages for their attrociously tortured victims. Religion can be very twisted.

SHUNNING: How did you feel after your 1st?

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