Is it a concious matter?

ButtLight

I have been out for the most part since 1985. I was told by a friend, that in that year, they changed their views on association with df'd family members. (I wouldnt know, thats the year I got the boot lol)

I always thought up till this day, it was ok for imediate family members, but just not to eat with them. I know my imediate family still talks to me, the rest dont. Then again, 3 of us out of 5 are df'ed! So, Im wondering if people are getting pulled aside and told not to associate with their brothers, sisters, or mom and dad?

Legolas

I thought that you could only talk to them if they lived with you?

JH

No matter what the law was then, its todays law that counts.

If you're df'd family members can talk to you

I had a df'd uncle, and an elder told me to shun him. I didn't because he was generous...lmao

ButtLight

I really have no clue anymore. About two months ago, my sis in law said its still a concious matter, but now I hear different.

JH

its still a concious matter

That means if they love you, they'll talk to you.....and if they don't they wont.

JH

I think that people here are also shunning you....lmao

stevenyc

ButtLight, there hasn't been any alteration for a while. If a disfellowshipped relative no longer lives in the same household then contact is severed EXECPT for extenuating 'family related' circumstances.

Kingdom Ministry Aug, 2002. p.4 says:

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Relatives Not in the Household: "The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living outside the immediate family circle and home," states The Watchtower of April 15, 1988, page 28. "It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum," in harmony with the divine injunction to "quit mixing in company with anyone" who is guilty of sinning unrepentantly. (1 Cor. 5:11) Loyal Christians should strive to avoid needless association with such a relative, even keeping business dealings to an absolute minimum.—See also The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 29-30.

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The Watchtower addresses another situation that can arise: "What if a close relative, such as a son or a parent who does not live in the home, is disfellowshiped and subsequently wants to move back there? The family could decide what to do depending on the situation. For example, a disfellowshiped parent may be sick or no longer able to care for himself financially or physically. The Christian children have a Scriptural and moral obligation to assist. (1 Tim. 5:8) . . . What is done may depend on factors such as the parent’s true needs, his attitude and the regard the head of the household has for the spiritual welfare of the household."—The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 28-9.

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As for a child, the same article continues: "Sometimes Christian parents have accepted back into the home for a time a disfellowshiped child who has become physically or emotionally ill. But in each case the parents can weigh the individual circumstances. Has a disfellowshiped son lived on his own, and is he now unable to do so? Or does he want to move back primarily because it would be an easier life? What about his morals and attitude? Will he bring ‘leaven’ into the home?—Gal. 5:9."

steve

BluesBrother

The "Shepherd The flock In Your Care " book says

"Normally, a close relative would not be disfellowshipped

for associating with a disfellowshipped person unless there

is spiritual association or an effort made to justify or

excuse the wrongful course.

UNIT 5 (a) "

But I am sure that this KM supplement is still the current position:

km

8/02 Display Christian Loyalty When a Relative Is Disfellowshipped ***

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"Relatives Not in the Household: "The situation is different if the disfellowshipped or disassociated one is a relative living outside the immediate family circle and home," states The Watchtower of April 15, 1988, page 28. "It might be possible to have almost no contact at all with the relative. Even if there were some family matters requiring contact, this certainly would be kept to a minimum," in harmony with the divine injunction to "quit mixing in company with anyone" who is guilty of sinning unrepentantly. (1 Cor. 5:11) Loyal Christians should strive to avoid needless association with such a relative, even keeping business dealings to an absolute minimum.—See also The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 29-30.

10

The Watchtower addresses another situation that can arise: "What if a close relative, such as a son or a parent who does not live in the home, is disfellowshiped and subsequently wants to move back there? The family could decide what to do depending on the situation. For example, a disfellowshiped parent may be sick or no longer able to care for himself financially or physically. The Christian children have a Scriptural and moral obligation to assist. (1 Tim. 5:8) . . . What is done may depend on factors such as the parent’s true needs, his attitude and the regard the head of the household has for the spiritual welfare of the household."—The Watchtower of September 15, 1981, pages 28-9.

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As for a child, the same article continues: "Sometimes Christian parents have accepted back into the home for a time a disfellowshiped child who has become physically or emotionally ill. But in each case the parents can weigh the individual circumstances. Has a disfellowshiped son lived on his own, and is he now unable to do so? Or does he want to move back primarily because it would be an easier life? What about his morals and attitude? Will he bring ‘leaven’ into the home?—Gal. 5:9."

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Benefits of Being Loyal to Jehovah: Cooperating with the Scriptural arrangement to disfellowship and shun unrepentant wrongdoers is beneficial. It preserves the cleanness of the congregation and distinguishes us as upholders of the Bible’s high moral standards. (1 Pet. 1:14-16) It protects us from corrupting influences. (Gal. 5:7-9) It also affords the wrongdoer an opportunity to benefit fully from the discipline received, which can help him to produce "peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness."—Heb. 12:11.

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After hearing a talk at a circuit assembly, a brother and his fleshly sister realized that they needed to make adjustments in the way they treated their mother, who lived elsewhere and who had been disfellowshipped for six years. Immediately after the assembly, the man called his mother, and after assuring her of their love, he explained that they could no longer talk to her unless there were important family matters requiring contact. Shortly thereafter, his mother began attending meetings and was eventually reinstated. Also, her unbelieving husband began studying and in time was baptized.

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Loyally upholding the disfellowshipping arrangement outlined in the Scriptures demonstrates our love for Jehovah and provides an answer to the one that is taunting Him. (Prov. 27:11) In turn, we can be assured of Jehovah’s blessing. King David wrote regarding Jehovah: "As for his statutes, I shall not turn aside from them. With someone loyal you will act in loyalty."—2 Sam. 22:23, 26.

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So you may not be d/f'd yourself, but in my last congo a sister was marked because she associated with her teenage daughter. The girl was pregnant and had been advised of complications in her pregnamcy . A mother's love was not allowed to influence her loyalty to the congo. (I did argue against it but the rest of the body were determined) In reality they did not like this sister much.

stevienyc - great minds think alike!

garybuss

Everything is a conscience matter . . . the only question is . . . who owns your (or their) conscience.

RichieRich

Well, I believe my mom and grandmother were told to only discuss family business with me. My mother occasionally tried to interject something dub related (i.e. Are you missing anybody? Upset about anything?) but I would correct her.

She told me I was as good as dead to her. When I moved out, she asked if I would call and check in with her on occasion. I told her that since I was dead, we should only discuss family business, and said I'd see her at my grandmother's funeral.

Its harsh, but I do believe she had it coming.

Is it a concious matter?

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