girlfriend pregnate

by shaun t 27 Replies latest social family

  • MsMcDucket
    Ok guys, he screwed up royally and spelling is not his thing.

    I agree with you MJ. He came here for help, not to be put down for spelling or grammatical errors. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the best speller or writer; and I use the exclamation point liberally!

    So, Shaun, don't worry about your spelling. I understood what you were trying to say. People make mistakes every day. It sounds like you want you, your girl, and child to be a family. You don't have to become a Jehovah's Witness to get married, and don't you let them make you do it, either! If your girl loves you and wants to be with you, she will come back. If not, you're going to have to go to court to make sure you have visiting rights with your child.

  • jstalin

    Ok, I have to turn jerk mode back on.

    Is getting your girlfriend pregnant (at what appears to be an early age) really just a mistake? Spelling and grammar do certainly give an indication of education level and intelligence (although I will admit that it isn't always the case, but they are good indicators). So, a young guy that looks like he doesn't have a the greatest education in the world, therefore unlikely to be able to financially deal with the consequences of his actions, simply committed a mistake? I would call the situation a serious error in judgment, not a mistake.

    With that being said:

    Shaun - some advice. You're old enough to make kids, so you're old enough to deal with the situation as an adult. You need to talk to your girlfriend and her parents, assert your parental rights, and build your family with your girlfriend, not her parents dictating what your life will be.

  • Check_Your_Premises


    No it is more than a mistake. There is a reason ancient cultures would kill people for doing such things. Our modern society has taken some of the edge off the consequences of this particular "mistake". Though the costs are more hidden now, we don't have "street urchins" anymore.

    On the other hand the costs are still significant. There is a reason that the term "bastard" has such a negative connotation. It isn't just that a person is of questionable parentage. People raised outside of a viable family structure tend to revert to barbarism.... aka act like rotten bastards!!!

    With that said, and it should be, we should avoid sounding judgemental. We all do awful things. Hate the sin not the sinner? We cant go back in time, so let's deal with what can help the situation. Making Shaun feel like an asshole probably won't make him very productive. I think that is all MJ is saying.

    So Shaun, you did something really reckless and awful. Other people will probably pay the consequences of your actions long after you have passed. With that being said, there is an whole lot you can do to lessen the damage of your actions. You need to be apart of that child's life. You need to learn to masturbate (stop having children!!!) and start thinking about things like marketable skills (getting a decent job) and what kind of father you want to be... what kind of life you want for your child.

    I hope you choose well.... so your kid doesn't rob me in 15 years or try to hand me cult literature.


  • diamondblue1974
    I agree with you MJ. He came here for help, not to be put down for spelling or grammatical errors. I'll be the first to admit that I'm not the best speller or writer; and I use the exclamation point liberally!

    Absolutely, I am actually quite appalled that he's been ridiculed so much; I mean if someone posts incredulous ideas without substance or supporting evidence they deserve everything they get but this lad deserves a break in my view.

    Theres no need to resort to 'jerkmode' in fact the need to do so demonstrates a clear similarity to actual persona.

    Welcome to the forum Shaun, I hope you get matters sorted out and that things work out for you, the more geniune on here have offered some excellent advice- take it.


  • M.J.

    Yes, Shaun, I hope you come back. You'll find a wide variety of opinions and viewpoints here. Some will come off as "abrasive" but don't let that discourage you. Most of all, understanding this whole world you plunged yourself into is crucial right now. I hope you can step up to the challenges you face right now. You WILL need help with this so don't be shy and get as much help as you can get. There are some here who have gone through similar challenges. Trust me on that.

  • Check_Your_Premises

    guilty as charged...

    Tons of help here shaun. I hope you can look past the other stuff and find what you need.


  • lisavegas420

    I was a good lil' JW. I got pregnant by a non-JW.

    My dad and another elder went to this guy (who was living with his parents) one Saturday morning. (I should have know something was up when I didn't get too much slack for saying I felt too sick to go out in the field service that morning)...... The guy and I were actually on the phone talking to each other, when my dad and the elder showed up at the door.

    This guy joined the military, I ran off and married the guy. Then I went home to my parents house. Then the guy got discharged for his bad conduct. Three years later we divorced. We never lived together. He's only seen his daugher who is now 26, less that 5 times her entire life.

    Anyway...good luck with that. Hope you do the right thing.


  • godsgraceisfree

    Hello shaun, I would say that it would not be a good idea to go back because she is pregnant. tell her you want to be involved and that you will be a good dad. tell her you want to be their for your child but that being a jehovah witness is not what you believe in and that you would be living a lie. (if that is how you feel of course) hopefully if you stick by your guns but are also loving and supportive that may be the glue for you guys. That is what makes this whole religion so nuts is that God is love, and Jesus came to set us free, but this religion does not show much love and you are capitve! Just a thought I will pray for your situation and the protection of your unborn child as well. I am glad you care so much Meri

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