Slaying the Demons in My Basement, Part Two

by Fleur 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • Gill
    Gill

    (((((((( Essie ))))))))

    Well done!

  • hemp lover
    hemp lover

    Wow. Beautifully written, Essie. Thank you.

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41

    Well, I've got a whole closet of old clothes I've been hanging onto, just waiting til I lose that weight I've put on..............this thread has again put it to the forefront of my denying mind...........

  • Sad emo
    Sad emo

    Thank you for sharing Essie.

    This is a huge help for me.

  • Fleur
    Fleur

    ((((((Sad Emo))))) You seem to need a hug, so there's one for you. I'm glad that this helped you in some small way.

    To those hanging on to closets and boxes full of stuff. I can't tell you how happy I feel knowing that the junk is gone! No more 'landmines' waiting for me when I go to do the laundry! My husband said that he felt wonderful after it was gone too.

    Now, just to hit the boxes in the bedroom closet and decide what goes there (probably some things from my sister lurking in there) and then, my space will really feel like mine again!

    Sunnygal...I know what you mean about the old clothes. If you can't wear them now or would need to drop several sizes to wear them (like some of the stuff I ditched too) then it's just my experience that holding on to them makes you feel worse. Think of it this way; if they're old and worn out, then you won't want to wear them when you get to your goal anyway. If they're not, then think of the people who could use them in the mean time if you donated them to a women's shelter or something. Don't tie yourself into an idea that you have to be a certain size again (this spoken by someone with lifelong food/body image issues) just make it your goal to eat healthy and feel as good as you can.

    It's not wasteful to let go of something that is holding you down. Find a good use for it, or just let it go. I can tell you that it is a fabulous feeling!

    hugs

    essie

  • Jankyn
    Jankyn

    Dear Essie/Fleur:

    I'm glad I went looking for this. What an inspiring piece of work.

    I, too, have been trying to unload the boxes--both literal and figurative--that I've been carting around. Here's a hint: If it doesn't fit anymore, discard it. That applies to ways of thinking as much as to jeans.

    I had a real breakthrough a couple of weeks after my dad's funeral. As I was struggling with how I could "fix" my relationship with my mother (after all, now she's a widow and she "needs" me), it occurred to me that I cannot repair what I didn't break. Our relationship was damaged from the beginning, and as an infant and child, I can't be responsible for that. I'm only responsible for what I do and say.

    What a relief.

    BTW, I've had the experience of being "downgraded" from "family scandal" to "minor embarrassment." It happened when my brother had his third divorce--three marriages and he's never had a second anniversary. Apparently, that makes him more of a "problem" than his lesbian sister. Oh, well.

    Love,

    Jankyn

  • Alana
    Alana

    Your writing really touched me. I can relate to the part of having the non-JW husband being so wonderful, as I have truly experienced that myself. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41

    Ess, thanks...........those are wise words indeed.........i've thought of the same things myself, but, it sounds so much wiser coming from someone else...........i think what i'll do is just keep a couple things i really really like.......and give the rest to the Salvation Army. Thank you, again!!

    Terri

  • Fleur
    Fleur
    BTW, I've had the experience of being "downgraded" from "family scandal" to "minor embarrassment." It happened when my brother had his third divorce--three marriages and he's never had a second anniversary. Apparently, that makes him more of a "problem" than his lesbian sister. Oh, well.

    is that anything like being downgraded from a hurricane to a mere tropical depression? LOL

    I've been depressed, but never tropically...that I know of...

    :D

    Good for you sunnygal!!!!

    hugs essie

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