Another fun communication technique to use in situations like this is called "reflecting". It basically involves re-stating what the person has just said to you. It acknowledges their statement, lets them know you're actively listening to them, without making what they would perceive as negative or judgemental commentary. Throw in a few "how did that make you feel?" type questions, and it allows the person to open up even more. Here's an example:
Vitty's Daughter: I can't believe the elders are on our case about our service time again!
Vitty: The elders are on your case about your service time? Why would they do that?
Vitty's Daughter: There was a part on the convention about keeping active in service. I guess everyone is getting the same lecture.
Vitty: Yes, that's usually the source of the "lectures" as you called them. How did it make you feel?
Vitty's Daughter: It's so upsetting to hear them always tell us that they want us to always do more all the time! It's hard to keep up with all the demands on my time - I have to work, take care of the home, spend time with my husband, and go to all the meetings, and yet it's never enough!
Vitty: It sounds like you're feeling overwhelmed, and I agree it certainly puts a lot of demands on your time. Do you and hubby still do fun things together like you did when you were dating?
Vitty's Daughter: There's just never any time for that anymore. It's always service-this, meeting-that, prepare for the meetings-the-other-thing. Sometimes it feels like that's all we ever do.
Vitty: That sounds like it could be hard on the relationship, is that what is happening?
etc, etc.