Busted?

serendipity

Just a bit of background: I'm an irregular JW who makes one or two Sunday meetings a month. That's down from nearly every Sunday meeting at the beginning of the year. I've been on the fringes of the congregation since I moved here, 10 years ago, and know very few JWs.

Recently I went out to dinner with a man, not a JW, and an elder and his wife (know their names, that's about it) from my cong. were there. I just briefly said "Hi, how are y'all?" as I passed their table. I didn't stop to chat. They left a bit later, and I could enjoy my meal then.

I'm really wondering if I'm going to get approached about my "date". The elders haven't been interested in my daughter or me at other times. Though I've been inactive at times over the years, I've never had a shepherding call or anything. I'm hoping this is a nonissue, but if it isn't, any helpful hints to shut off any questions that may be asked?

IP_SEC

Though I've been inactive at times over the years, I've never had a shepherding call or anything.

If an elder gets a burr under his saddle or his wife gets on his back about what they saw, he might choose to make it an issue. He will prolly discuss what he saw with the other elders and they will decide what to do.

If they ask, its really none of their biznax. Going on a date isnt a judicial matter. Besides they only have authority over you if you give it. You could tell them to butt out, lie: "it was a business dinner" or refuse to talk to them at all.

Scully

Theocratic War Strategy™ = "it is not necessary to divulge truthful information to people who are not entitled to it". That's from the Insight Book, under the heading "LIE".

Now you have to decide whether this Elder™ or his wife are "entitled" to personal information about you. Since they haven't taken a personal interest in you in the last decade, what makes them think that they have the right to know who you were having dinner with?

For all they know, this is a relative visiting you from out of town, or a meeting with a client from work. Don't let them intimidate you into believing that you owe them the truth about who you were with and what you were doing besides enjoying a meal together. You don't owe them an explanation. If they (or another Elder™) takes it upon themselves to pry, just remind them that in the 10 years you've been associated with the congregation, in Good Standing™, not once did anyone - let alone the Body of Elders™ - take a personal interest in you, and it's a case of "too little too late". Oh and add something along the lines of "How DARE you imply that something unchristian was taking place! I am so offended! This is enough to stumble me for a very long time!!"

NewYork44M

If asked you can say, "It was a business meeting", or "He was my relative." My guess is that the elder doesn't know for sure if you are married or single. I doubt you will ever hear from him.

Jourles

I guess my first question would be.....Were the two of you sitting next to each other, or across from each other?

greendawn

I don't think they can do anything to you just because you went out with someone, but it's not their business to interfere since they are otherwise totally indifferent for you and your daughter.

This is what I hate about the dubs they don't want to give anything (help, moral support) but the other hand they want to impose their rules on people.

LittleToe

Following on from Jourles: Were you holding hands? How short was your skirt? What shade of lipstick were you wearing? Was it after 6pm? We're just concerned about your spirituality, sister!

nicolaou

From the same Insight Book article that Scully mentioned;

***

it-2 p. 245 Lie ***

Jehovah God allows "an operation of error" to go to persons who prefer falsehood "that they may get to believing the lie"

serendipity

So far, so good. No phone calls or messages from the elder.

Thanks y'all. I have to laugh at Scully and LT. I'll use the "I'm so offended" line if needed. Fortunately we didn't sit by each other and I didn't have on a tarty outfit or the scarlet passion lipstick.

serendipity

So far, so good. It's been three months since the elder spotted me on a 'date'. No word from the elders.

Busted?

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