Do you still have trouble shedding the 'watchtower filters' at times?

by AK - Jeff 7 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    I have fully rejected the false religion of Jehovah's witnesses - after 43 years a believer in the nonsense. Now though, I often find that I still filter the world thru Watchtower spectacles, even after almost three years out. I don't do it on purpose, in fact I defy the Wt doctrine whenever I can and work hard to change my mindset to more 'moderate Christian' thinking. Still it persists at times and infuriates me;

    Flag salute - voting - politics - friendships - grooming - view of sex and marriage - movie ratings - various holidays. On and On. Not that I still follow the Wt thinking - I don't. But I still have it weighing heavily on the scale when I think of how to handle certain matters or situations in life.

    Just bugs me that my mind was submerged so deeply that I can't get this shyty doctrine out of mind and live my life at times. Damn.

    There were many good things that came out of the experience - my wife for one. And my upright character and honesty for another. These things I don't regret - I just wish the filters would fall away and let me think without the overlays of thought.

    Jeff

  • sinamongurl
    sinamongurl
    Flag salute - voting - politics - friendships - grooming - view of sex and marriage - movie ratings - various holidays. On and On. Not that I still follow the Wt thinking - I don't. But I still have it weighing heavily on the scale when I think of how to handle certain matters or situations in life.

    ALL THE TIME!!!!

    although it gets less and less and times goes on.....i still have guilt over certain things at times....lol

  • fullofdoubtnow
    fullofdoubtnow

    I still feel the prick of conscience over some things. I live with my boyfriend, another ex jw, nowadays, something I would never have done as a jw, and though I am very happy here, I do feel guilty about that sometimes. I smoke occasionally in public, and consciously look around to see if there is anyone who knows me nearby. My bf, who has been out a lot longer than me, has no such hang ups, and says mine will pass in time. I'm sure he's right, but for now I guess the wts rules still affect me to a degree.

  • moanzy
    moanzy

    I follow my hubbys lead most of the time. I'm so used to everything being bad that I had to stop myself all the time and ask hubby what he thinks.

    It was difficult at first to let my little girl salute the flag. Not that I didn't want her to just that it was an automatic thought. I had to actually remind myself that its ok for the kids to do these things.

    Moanzy

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41

    Jeff, hon, I KNOW exactly what you mean. Stop and think, though. I've been out seven years out of twenty five...........every year that passes, the less the old mind set pops up..........and, of course, there are just some doctrines or teachings that I laugh at, just as you said. Give yourself time, I think that is ALL that is going to get rid of the programming.

    Terri

  • peacefulpete
    peacefulpete

    There was some value in being an 'outsider' while in the JWs. We learned that its possible to be different and buck the tide. Not every trend is healthy or constructive. When leaving one box don't simply slip under another in an effort to be "normal". Think critically and be true to yourself.

  • Honesty
    Honesty

    It takes some time to shake. The purveyors of "TRUTH" are good at what they do.

  • hamsterbait
    hamsterbait

    AK J -

    If you were dragged up a Witless, changing the way you think because of the ***** is every bit as difficult as somebody trying to readjust their attitudes to sex or alcohol after growing up in a family where drunken relatives and babysitters molested you.

    I have had to deal with both issues - believe me, the doctrinal stuff is easiest to get rid of, the programming can require professional help.

    Even if you cannot afford this, or are still filled with fear of it because of WT programming, I must say that Lady Lee has been running a series of threads which ring very true, and are helpful.

    HB (of the "Hating those B*******s " Class)

Share this

Google+
Pinterest
Reddit