The Speeding Ticket

by KW13 4 Replies latest social humour

• 

  KW13

  An older lady gets pulled over for speeding...
  >
  > Older Woman: Is there a problem, officer?
  >
  > Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
  >
  > Older Woman: Oh, I see.
  >
  > Officer: Can I see your license please?
  >
  > Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
  >
  > Officer: Don't have one?
  >
  > Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
  >
  > Of! Ficer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration
  >papers please.
  >
  > Older Woman: I can't do that.
  >
  > Officer: Why not?
  >
  > Older Woman: I stole this car.
  >
  > Officer: Stole it?
  >
  > Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the
  >owner.
  >
  > Officer: You what?
  >
  > Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the
  >trunk if you want to see
  >
  > The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away
  >to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the
  >car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn
  >gun.
  >
  > Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle
  >please!
  >
  > The woman steps out of her vehicle.
  >
  > Older woman: Is there a problem sir?
  >
  > Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have
  >stolen this car and murdered the owner.
  >
  > Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
  >
  > Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of
  >your car, please.
  >
  > The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an
  >empty trunk.
  >
  > Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
  >
  > Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
  >
  > The officer is quite stunned.
  >
  > Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not
  >have a driving license.
  >
  > The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch
  >purse and hands it to the officer.
  >
  > The officer examines the license. He looks quite
  >puzzled.
  >
  > Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me
  >you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered
  >and hacked up the owner.
  >
  > Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding too.
• 

  misanthropic

  lol that was good
• 

  Virgochik

  That's a good one!
• 

  runningrussianboy

  So FUNNEEEEEEEEEEEEE
• 

  BlackPearl

  Hahaha, the best of reverse psychcology.