Double Standards with Liberal Witness Friends

by Fleshybirdfodder 19 Replies latest jw friends

  • Fleshybirdfodder
    Fleshybirdfodder


    I'm sure this may have been covered, but many ex witnesses I know that have not been formally df'd or dissasociated thenselves still retain some friends among Witnesses. Any friends I have for the most part that are still in the org are really congenial people, until it comes down to any discussion that might teeter on the edge of being remotely deep. I've had one friend I hadn't seen in a while who came to visit me tell me right off the bat that we were not to "discuss religion", because I'm "too smart" and he "he won't be able to argue" with me. I'm not the type of person who incessantly brings the knives out on friends' beliefs, however, for a relationship to be close and substantial things do need to get deep at times. All my non witness friends have absolutely no problem discussing philosophy, theology, science along with sports or music or beer or whatever, and have no problem disagreeing with me and vice versa. It's how we get to know eachother as people. It feels like I'm walking on eggshells with my Witness friends, but I want to show them we all aren't rabid, scary, frothy mouthed apostates. Eventually it gets tiresome avoiding real discussions. Any advice or comments?

  • cyd0099
    cyd0099

    Just a comment;
    In your discussions with non-dub friends, they can be open to admitting to being wrong or at the least accepting the fact that your viewpoint has merit. A dub cannot.It would mean the WTS™ (AKA; god) is wrong.

    Everything they know has to be right or the whole world WTS™ construct starts to unravel. Hence, the warnings to stay away from rabid apostates at all costs.

    I know they might be nice enough people, but you are never going to get the kind of close friendship you are seeking as long as they remain in.

  • in a new york bethel minute
    in a new york bethel minute

    whatever you're just jealous cuz you know they have the truth and you don't

    bethel

  • Ariel84
    Ariel84


    Even looking at another religion's literature was labeled "apostate" when I was growing up. How ridiculous is that? All I knew was what I was told at the KH and by my parents. I would express doubts to my JW best friend whom I trusted and was told I needed to "talk to the elders and pray about it". She would say "the end is so close, you haven't got that much time to question". After awhile you just don't want to bring it up anymore it gets so fatiguing!

  • garybuss
    garybuss

    There might be Witness acquaintances, there might be Witness relatives, there might be Witness business associates, but I'm absolutely convinced there is no such thing as a Witness friend.
    I think "Witness friend", is like the tooth fairy, Santa Claus, ghosts, goblins, and gods . . . it's a figment of somebody's active imagination.

  • Gill
    Gill

    Welcome FBF!

    Love your name!

  • Highlander
    Highlander

    but I'm absolutely convinced there is no such thing as a Witness friend.

    Gary, I completely agree. I think we all know that 'friendship' among 'witnesses' is conditional. Conditional friendship is not friendship at all.

  • serendipity
    serendipity

    Hi fleshy, welcome to the forum!

    It feels like I'm walking on eggshells with my Witness friends,

    That's probably the price you have to pay to have JW friends. If you value the friendship, in whatever form, then you may have to accept this limitation. Besides, if you were a JW, you already know their 'official' thoughts on beliefs. I also think that not everyone has to be a 'best' friend, so it may not be necessary to talk about deeper subjects. It's good to know that you're there for them in the event they start to have doubts and can talk to you.

  • juni
    juni

    Gary, you took the words right out of my mouth!!

    There's a HUGE difference between being friendly and being a friend.

    Juni

  • juni
    juni

    Oops....

    WELCOME TO THE BOARD! Look forward to more of your posts.

    Juni

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