Last Thursdayism

by Cygnus 18 Replies latest jw friends

  • Cygnus
    Cygnus

    This is a chat I had a few months ago on Yahoo (you people who chat on this stupid board, get yer asses over to Yahoo, NOW!).

    -------------------------------------------------------------

    jag1lisa: what religion are you

    cygnustsp: Last Thursdayist

    jag1lisa: i have never heard of that

    jag1lisa: lol

    cygnustsp: you should

    jag1lisa: well what is it

    jag1lisa: i mean what religion

    cygnustsp: We believe that the universe was created Last Thursday

    jag1lisa: what?

    jag1lisa: i dont get it

    jag1lisa: that is the wierdest thing i have heard yet

    cygnustsp: I know, it's hard to comprehend

    jag1lisa: im not saying anything about what you believe...its just
    odd i have never heard of it

    cygnustsp: Essentially, we believe that everything was created Last Thursday, and we are endowed with memories, appearance of age, and so forth

    cygnustsp: the cycle continues every Thursday

    jag1lisa: wow....and why do you believe this...i mean do get it out of the holy bible

    cygnustsp: no, it is not in the Bible

    jag1lisa: then why do you believe it

    cygnustsp: No one has yet to disprove our doctrine, so we accept it by faith

    jag1lisa: wow thats strange

    jag1lisa: did someone just make it up or what?

    cygnustsp: Nobody knows the exact origins

    jag1lisa: wow that blows my mind

    cygnustsp: Well, think about it. Isn't it fascinating that every Thursday you wake up a different person in a different life in a different universe?

    jag1lisa: no i dont

    jag1lisa: what makes thursday different than any othr day

    cygnustsp: well, it has a nice ring to it, doesn't it? I mean, Last Mondayism sounds dumb

    jag1lisa: yeah but then you are saying its just the name then

    jag1lisa: see thursday is no differnt than any other day of the week

    cygnustsp: you sound like you have doubts

    jag1lisa: doubts about what?

    cygnustsp: doubts about the truth of Last Thursdayism. if you're really interested in understanding the truth of the matter, I can arrange for someone in a local congregation to drop by and assist you

    jag1lisa: yeah i have doubts cause there is no proof i mean nothing to go by

    cygnustsp: that's why you need faith

    jag1lisa: i mean it doesnt even go by Gods holy word

    jag1lisa: so any blow joe walking down the street says ok lets make a religion about thursdays and people start following him i dont get it

    cygnustsp: well, that is usually how religions get started

    jag1lisa: no it isnt..most religions started with a book...the holy bible, the book of mormonisn....etc

    jag1lisa: do you guys have a book or bible you go by

    cygnustsp: but a person has to write the book first

    jag1lisa: so what else do you beliebve in your religiong

    cygnustsp: I guess you are also unfamiliar with the Last Thursdayism newsletters that get circulated once a week

    cygnustsp: no, we have no official textbook or written dogma

    jag1lisa: lol a newsletter is something that someone makes up...the bible has been around for ages

    cygnustsp: actually, the Bible has only been around since Last Thursday

    jag1lisa: haha i gotta go dude......this is the funniest thing i have ever heard

    cygnustsp: okay, be careful what you mock, next Thursday you might come back as a porcupine

    jag1lisa: right....maybe if you would wake up from your dream

    cygnustsp: I will, tomorrow of course

    jag1lisa: hahahahahaha

  • Seeker
    Seeker

    How incredibly offensive! Everybody knows that Last Wednesdayism is the only true religion. My guess is that you couldn't handle the requirements of Last Wednesdayism and lapsed by a day. Poor misguided soul...

  • somebody
    somebody

    lol

    peace,
    somebody....who wants to come back looking like Pam Anderson, Thursday, and wonderin who I should pray to to mke it happen.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Excellent stuff.

    You guys (and you KNOW who you are) are a delight to read.

    "I don't believe in the Trooth Fairy anymore."
  • Introspection
    Introspection

    You two infidels are both wrong. Anyone can see by the facts that Friday is the day of creation. Haven't you ever heard of TGIF??

    Some, you stay just the way you are, I'm sure you have a lot more class than PA.

  • felix a
    felix a

    Now I know the importance of S.H.I.T. - I mean Thursdayism must be true... It explains why we can say S.H.I.T. and mean it.

    I mean really, doesn't everyone just say S.H.I.T., at least once in a while.

    It's true that we are frequently relieved that S.H.I.T. is over.

    And we all know that S.H.I.T. happens.

    So all you heretics who believe in T.G.I.F and in Last Wednesdayism will just have to realize the error of your ways and accept S.H.I.T. ;-)

    You to can be happy if you rember this simple thought:

    Sure Happy It's Thursday[/b]

    felix a (David P)

    "Vision is the art of seeing things invisible"
    Swift

  • SlayerLayer
    SlayerLayer

    Yes, intro has it right. Lastfridayism is the only true religion, and Yadirf is our god.

  • COMF
    COMF

    What in the WORLD is wrong with someone speaking truth... even in candicy? WHY is truth so unrealistic... and difficult... for you to 'hear'?

    Now, believe me, I understand the 'baggage': religion has lied to us, the WTBTS has lied to us, earthling man has lied to us, etc., etc. But if someone comes to you NOT saying 'believe me' or 'believe IN me', but only wishes to SHARE what they have been 'given', why do you feel compelled to respond maliciously?

    AGhast

  • Naeblis
    Naeblis

    ROFL COMF :P

  • SlayerLayer
    SlayerLayer

    OMG! LOL@COMF

    Slayer

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