I'm so sorry to here about your son. I've been a nurse for many years. PLEASE do whatever the docs want to do. I know you realize how serious this is. Actually--life or death, in a very short time. Feel free to tell me to mind my own business, but this is a subject I'm passionate about. I've had the blessing to be able to intervene twice, when the elders were trying to but in and trying to play the guilty card.
If th elders or any JW's are giving you a hard time, go to the charge nurse and/or the social worker. Explain to them what is going on, or even let them know what might occur. Nurse's can best help if they know what's coming. This is a time when your focus needs to be on your child. Not on worrying about stupid things. I've helped a hospital get guardianship two different times on toddlers that the elders were trying to meddle with. I even had them thrown out of the hospital. The nurses don't mind "kicking out the trash!
Let me know if I can be of help. You all will be in my prayers.