Back when I was 18, I was literally putting on the 'happy face' during every visit to the kingdom hall. I did this because I felt that I was supposed to look happy and was hoping
that it would help speed up the process of becoming a ministerial servant. I remember that the moment I would arrive at the hall, I would put on the biggest smile I could muster,
walk around and shake hands with all the elders, servants, pioneers, etc. I would make it a point to be friendly, ask how they were, however it was meaningless chit chat in reality
During this 'happy time' all I could think about is how pathetic and miserable I am. Guess what? it worked,, I was appointed a servant at 19 years of age, having never pioneered
or anything other that putting on the 'happy face'(fake ofcourse)
So there I was, a new ministerial servant,,, hoping, waiting, expecting to feel that happiness they talk about when you attain these 'priviledges'
I continued my 'happy face' at the meetings,, maybe a year later it was all I could take, I hated being a 'drone' just going through the motions only worried about appearance
and at the same time, sorely lacking any substance. I stepped down, and decided I will never be a stooge like that again.
Now I truly have a 'happy face'