Is it always ethical to try to help someone get out?

by wanderlustguy 25 Replies latest jw friends

  • wanderlustguy
    wanderlustguy

    Is it ever better or ethical to let someone go on believing in The Truth even though it is a lie?

  • Ellie
    Ellie

    Some people such as older people who have been in a long time would have big problems trying to adjust to life outside of the congregation, and to take away their hope of an afterlife would be cruel.

    However, I wouldn't want to be the one to decide.

    Anyone young enough to make a life for themselves again I reckon should be helped out.

  • blondie
    blondie

    I think it would unethical to help someone out and then abandon them to their own devices. People need support at that time.

    I guess it's like asking yourself if you should tell your friend that you know for a fact and can prove it that their spouse is being unfaithful to them. I have heard some "advice" gurus say not to tell your friend.

    Not an easy question.

    Blondie

  • AK - Jeff
    AK - Jeff

    Very thought provoking question.

    My Mom was an inactive witness - but she died thinking it was the 'truth'. I had discovered that it wasn't a few months before, but elected not to add confusion to her life at that point. She wasn't 'in' in the classic meaning of the word. But she was mentally.

    Someone's veiw of the religion might make a difference in how they act too. If one is convinced that it is a mind-bending cult, dangerous, and controlled even by Satan, he would prob act in a different mindset than one who just now accepts it [the WTS] as another religion, though wrong in it's doctrine.

    Perspective would make all difference in action here.

    Jeff

  • JH
    JH

    Some people need to be told lies and fairy tales to feel secure and be happy.

    I think that there are half truths in the JW Org.

    I believe that there WILL be a paradise earth one day, but not soon, like they say.

    So, I wouldn't try to tell someone it's a lie, but rather say it won't happen soon, or even in your life time.

  • SixofNine
    SixofNine

    No.

  • Ms. Whip
    Ms. Whip

    good topic.

    it is ethical to try to help someone in need, someone who is being harmed, someone who wants help.

    it has to be the right time, the right circumstance and the person has to be ready.

    for the majority of witnesses, this isn't the case.

    the witnesses are a functional society of disfunctional people. a person hardly noticed in the "world" can have a pseudo life as a jw. that life comes with purpose, respect, self-esteem, a social network. to pull back the curtain and reveal the fraud would destroy that person's world.

    i can say with certain experience, that having your entire world ripped away is emotionally and psychologically devastating.

    would i return to the jws knowing what i know now just to have a piece of the life i had before? no.

    do i wish i was still an ignorant and happy jw? no.

    would i risk the few fragile relationships that i currently have with active jw relatives to try and "get them out"? no.

    do i think jws are misguided and if they are willing deserve to know the truth? yes.

    Strange as it may seem, some people are better off as JW's. I can't defend that logically and I cannot understand why, but some have quit and gone back and are happier. It may be for the wrong reasons, but sometimes being at peace is more important than being "right", if there can be a "right" or "wrong" in this issue. - mcsemike Re: im hurt, desperate, confused and considering this religion - advice?
  • Check_Your_Premises
    Check_Your_Premises

    Steven Hassan says that no matter how long a person has been in, they will always yearn to be free. I have also heard people here say that they are glad they are out.

    I wonder some times though. I know people that have been in a VERY long time, they have just tuned it all out to keep their sanity. I wonder if a non-jw loved one spent some time and effort, that it wouldn't take much to give them a different perspective.

    I guess if a person is ready, they will find their way out. If they are not, there is nothing another person can do about it. So if we just help all we can, the ones who can't or shouldn't be help will protect themselves from the truth about the truth.

    CYP

  • freedomlover
    freedomlover

    CYP - I agree with all you said...

    I know people that have been in a VERY long time, they have just tuned it all out to keep their sanity

    this is something I have thought about my grandmother who is basically the reason EVERYONE in my family became a witness. She had a horrible life from day one, lost her mother at two, her father at 15, and then married an abusive alcoholic, lost a 15 year old son to a car accident, watched my grandfather slowly and painfully die, and now she is facing old age. I do think the JW teachings keep her somewhat sane. She has admitted flaws, but it's uncanny how her mind just snaps back to JW doctrine. I think it would be too painful for her, at this point in her life. but who knows.....not my choice to make for her.

  • wanderlustguy
    wanderlustguy

    It is a delimma for me right now. My brother is sick, very sick. He's surrounded by people who don't care at all for him and he's neglecting himself by depriving himself of the love of people who really do care for him. He could be surrounded or at least in the company of those who really do have his best interest at heart but instead is surrounded by false love and hypocracy.

    I don't really know how much longer he will live, he's only 29...it could very well be only a few years, makes me very angry.

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