Best urban legends, you heard in the org?

Nicolas

Personnally, I heard a lot of urban legends about the presence of a devil in a house. It was always the same kind of story about a devil who lived in a house and then the jw arrive and they pray Jehovah and suddendly, the demon go away...

bboyneko 2

Theres the classic smurf ones, walking smurfs, floating smurfs, etc.

But there is also alot about demonized dogs that suddenly appeared and chased pioneers and floated over the ground, etc.

Don't forgert blood in food products like snickers bars and ray franz gay rumors.

-Dan

jukief

Other than the normal walking Smurfs and demonized troll dolls, here's a couple of local ones I heard growing up.

For years I was told this story about my sister's aunt-in-law. She was a special pioneer and was rooming with a "worldly" woman. She started having demon attacks at night, when she was in bed. During the attacks, she couldn't breathe and felt like someone was choking her. She soon discovered (ta da!) that her roommate was involved in satanism and she threw the roommate out, but the attacks continued. After searching the house, she found hidden away in a closet a picture of the roommate. When she took it outside to burn it, the picture burned down to the woman's face and then wouldn't burn any more. After much praying and many doses of lighter fluid, the face finally burned and the demon attacks stopped.

Sound familiar? I've heard many similar stories. Well, a few years ago I met up with this woman's daughter and I told her about this story. She laughed and said that nothing like that ever happened to her mother.

Another one that happened in our congregation about 20 years ago was that one family was attending the district assembly in Texas (we lived in Colorado) and a friend of theirs reported that the mother of this family had personally witnessed Glen Campbell getting baptized. The congregation waited in anticipation for herto get home so they could hear all about it and see if she had pictures. When the family got home, the woman didn't know what people were talking about and where the story came from. :-)

ballistic

On a similar theme to yours...
Sister goes out in field service and chats to a lady about evil spirits. Upon returning to follow up the call with a leaflet, the lady was not at home, so the sister tried posting the leaflet through the door. As she did so, she fell into the door, which opened. The house was empty, dark and riddled with cob webs, apparently the house was not occupied for years!!!
I know many spooky urban legends if anyones interested?

I was too far out... and not waving but drowning - Stevie Smith

RunningMan

Here's one that I think is fairly original:

A JW couple, who know better, go to see a hypnotist's show.
They are intrigued by the idea, and can't resist. The show begins,
but none of the hypnotist's tricks are working. Finally, he turns to
the audience and asks if there are any Jehovah's Witnesses present.
The couple cowers in their seats. He asks again, saying that he knows
they are there. Finally, they come forward and he asks them to leave.
The show then proceeds, with the hypnosis working again.

bboyneko 2

The show begins,
but none of the hypnotist's tricks are working.

Gaawd...that shows such an ignorance about how hypnotism works. I've been to demonstrations in college and was amazed. Our sub-conscience is a crazy thing. Like saying a doctor's 'tricks' (vaccine, flu shot etc) didn't work because the jehovahs wtinesses were not allowing the doctors spirits to work.

-Dan

ballistic

You just reminded me about my ouija story.
The fact that ouija didn't work in my presence.
This bolstered my faith at the time, but I can't think why it wouldn't work now I know the truth.
Anyone?

I was too far out... and not waving but drowning - Stevie Smith

Eyebrow

I remember hearing about Smurfs at an assembly in a talk! And of course, Troll dolls were mentioned in the magazine as early as the late '60s, heehee.

Besides Ouija boards (which I will never use...I have heard too many first person accounts by nonJWS), my mom would not buy anything at a yard sale if she noticed anything she considered demonic there. In fact, there are a few people I have heard won't buy furniture from yard sales just in case.

Of course, my mom would not let us eat Mars Bars because the lecithin in it was supposedly from blood, not soy, hahah!

Kent

The Branch Overseer in Norway, Thor Samuelsen, once told me about a family having bought some furnitura at a garage sale, and OF COURSE they were attacked by demons.

Thanks to the "spiritual mature broters" like himself they sorted out the problem. It was an old kitchen stove, the ones with much stone and shit inside for keeping the warmth a long time.

"As you know, Kent", Thor told me, "iron and stone doesn't burn - and burning is the only safe way to get rid of demons. (They wanted me to burn some records as well - LOL) So we brought the old stove out to the ocean, and dropped it on deep water. BUt the problem was, the stove wouldn't sink! It bubbled and hissed around the stove - but sink it would not. So - we were praying intensely to Jehovah, and after a way the bubling and hissing increased to a violent roar - and then it sank. Jehovah is stronger than demons, Kent - remember that."

That was the same guy that borrowed my belt for a barbeque, a belt with "Happiness Is A Tight Pussy" written on it. He never noticed - thinking it was normal ornaments, I guess. One of the elders were looking with big eyes - but he didn't DARE saying anything. LOL

Yakki Da

Kent

"The only difference between a fool and the JW legal department is that a fool might be sympathetic ."

Daily News On The Watchtower and the Jehovah's Witnesses:
http://watchtower.observer.org

bboyneko 2

Blood in chocolate products is not an exclusive JW urban legend:

Claim: Chocolate milk contains cow's blood.
Status: False.
Examples:
When cows are milked, sometimes there is a great deal of blood that comes out along with the milk. This tainted milk is non-salable, except to the makers of pre-packaged chocolate milk, since the cocoa hides the blood. And chocolate milk makers get the milk at quite a bargain.
A co-worker recently told me that she had heard Nescafe Blend 43 instant coffee was somehow made with cow's blood. The rumour applied only to this blend of Nescafe. I checked the ingredients list, and it reads simply, "coffee beans".
I was drinking a chocolate "Milk Chug" made by Creamland when my friend asks "Is that Creamland chocolate milk?". I said yes and he responded "I am not sure if this is true, well,of course its not, but I heard it from my brother". He goes on to say that Creamland's chocolate milk has cow blood in it. Here is the reasoning:
To save money from wasted milk when a cow's utter begins to bleed, instead of throwing the bloody milk away, they add chocolate to it to disguise the taste and color. This way, no milk goes to waste . . . efficiency.

ions: Sometimes particular dairies or specific dark-colored, milk-based beverages are named.

Origins: The belief that yucky things lurk in the depths of dark-colored liquids is a widespread food fear. Blood is generally considered icky, so schoolchildren regularly horrify each other with whispered claims that the milk used in chocolate milk is just swimming with the stuff. Now that prepared coffee beverages are making it to the supermarket shelves we're seeing this particular tale expand to include those products, thereby broadening the age range of this rumor's audience.

(The belief that cow's blood is to be scrupulously avoided at all costs is suspended in our dealings with meat products. No one recoils in horror at the thought that a steak or a hamburger contains cow's blood -- our beef with ingesting blood apparently stops at the fork.)

In the U.S.A., the Food and Drug Administration oversees the safety of food products. Stringent standards have been established for all milk destined for consumers, including the chocolate variety. It is telling that this agency's specifications contain no allowances for the use of blood-contaminated milk. Milk products (and other foodstuffs) that do not meet the agency's criteria do not gain FDA approval and thus cannot be sold to consumers.

In other words, the "cow's blood in the chocolate milk" story doesn't fly any better than a cow would.

-Dan

Best urban legends, you heard in the org?

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