by Cygnus 12 Replies latest jw friends
spent all day today downtown being shuffled around to this building and that trying to get temporary assistance.. what a nightmare.. everyone tells you something different. and it's so humiliating. i didn't work my ass off for 17 years for this.
it's just very hard to think of losing my fiance, my house, my job, my cars, the use of my hands, electricity and heat, all in 8 months.
I'm so sorry! will be thinking of you. I know it doesn't help though.
My sister and I are so much alike that behaviorly its hard to distinguish the two. She is my negative voice, one that I fight. She throws pity parties and buys herself pity gifts. In her mind her life is as it is because of other people. This is my natural inclination. I hate it. I fight off and kill this seemingly innate desire to feel bad about the day. The only thing I have control over is me. So I try to exercise it. I'm not you Cygnus. I couldn't begin to imagine what you've gone through the past year. I do know what bad years are though. All you can do is take responsibility for what you can control.
I got hurt on a job when I was 19. I thought my life was over. I am 28% disabled. I lived on hand outs, beans, ramen, warm bedding near a fire place and hope for 8 months until my lawyer finally got me workers comp. I promised myself that if I was going to throw a pity party that it would only last 15 minutes. Some days I failed at this... most I succeeded. Take ownership of what you can and f*ck all of the rest.
I send you good vibes
CHL
Cygnus, I just read this post and realised how pitifully little I know about you. I assumed from your avatar that you were just a kid (which is why I came down on you a bit in your partypoker thread). Have you posted your story anywhere?
Hope the future gets better for you mate.
Thanks guys.
Nic, I've been on the online exjw scene since January 1997. I've been a member here since 2001. I'm nearing 34 years old. I've posted my story a few times. Click on my name and topic history... I recently posted some info. on my DFing and other updated stuff. And don't worry about coming down hard on me. You should have heard me yelling and swearing today at the asshole who parked his car in a no standing zone cutting me and my mom off.
edit: does my avatar really make me look that young? that's me doing an approximation of Alex DeLarge sans long hair from A Clockwork Orange. I'm always told I look young. A clerk ID'd me for cigarettes the other night and she was like "birthyear 1972! I'm sorry!" and I was like, no need to be sorry, I may look 18 but trust me, after open heart surgery, shot knees and back, and now my major disability with severed nerves I feel 80.
cygnus, sorry to here about your current state of affairs, i had know idea. you always seem so upbeat/positive. sending you good vibes, hang in there..... telltruth.
Hey Cyg,
I remember you from around 97. I practically lived in the "JW's and Friends" room on AOL where you frequented often. I was a hardcore JW and you were the only apostate I could tolerate. You were still married to your JW wife. You had none of the health issues I could recall that you're having now. That sucks btw... sorry to hear that.
I left the Org when the whole UN issue came up. I can't even remember now what year that was. By that time you were pretty much hanging out the Yahoo! chatroom which was a place I couldn't tolerate.
Anyway, seeing your name certainly makes me nostalgic.
Hope you get better, you're awfully young to be having to deal with all this crap.
O' Tay
Hang in there Cygnus. You'll be in my thoughts.
man, hang in there, dont lose hope and know that there are some of us, that even if we dont know you are willing to help... im one of those people, and i mean this, if u need anything, just pm me... ill do whatever i can for ya man..
the infamous one
Thanks again guys. I'm not asking for anything but a little sympathy I guess. And if my cable or electric gets shut off and I disappear, that's why.
Otay, what screen name did you use? Yeah the yahoo room could be a real mess. Opposers of JWs would come in there and rant and rave about the most retarded things, so I decided to start defending JWs and had them tied in knots as well as very frustrated. It was a lot more fun than being an apostate anymore. And those who knew me generally kept quiet to watch the show. I don't do any chat rooms any longer as my typing is atrocious, as I have to hover my hands over the keyboard and let them drop hoping my pointer finger hits the right keys, which is about 50/50, my backspace key is probably gonna give out soon.
