Interview with an Apostate: CyrusThePersian

by CyrusThePersian 6 Replies latest jw experiences

  • CyrusThePersian
    CyrusThePersian

    Tell us a little about yourself and your family.

    Not much to tell here. I'm divorced and live quite a distance away from my grown children, who are still in the "Truth."

    Were you a born in or a convert?

    Born in

    Are your parents / family JWs?

    My Mother and siblings are still JWs, although they don't appear to be very serious about it these days. My children are still pretty much gung-ho witnesses.

    How many generations have been JWs?

    Just three. My parents converted in the 1950's

    Did you hold any position in the WTS? (MS, Elder etc...)

    Yes. I was an Elder for many years.

    Did you *really* believe in the bible, in spirits (angels, demons)?

    At the time, I was a firm believer. I don't believe in any of that stuff today though.

    Did you get baptised? When and why?

    Yes in 1971. I got baptized because of peer pressure. All of my friends were getting baptized, so I did too!

    What was the initial trigger that made you start questioning things?

    I had little nagging doubts for quite a while but the real wake-up call was the November 1995 Watchtower where the 1914 generation teaching was abandoned.

    Where did you find information? Internet sites? Books?

    Both. I constantly mine the internet for information. Also Crisis of Conscience was a big eye-opener for me.

    How difficult or painful was the process of leaving?

    Not as difficult as you would imagine. Moving to a different town helped. I didn't know it at the time but I "faded" by moving to a new town and simply never attending the local Kingdom Hall here.

    Was it a big dramatic exit or a careful quiet fade?

    Careless but quiet fade.

    Did you convince anyone else to leave with you?

    Sadly, no. I'm still working on my kids though...

    How were your family relations affected by your decision?

    Very little. My kids know I don't go but they seem to be cool with it, probably because I haven't been in such a long time.

    Were you or are you still being shunned by those who didn't leave?

    Since I live in a different town than all my past JW friends, I don't know if they would shun me or not since I have no contact with them.

    How long have you now been out?

    Since 2001

    Was there anything you looked forward to doing when you left?

    Expanding my mind by reading what I want to read, seeing what I want to see and doing what I want to do, all without the JW fetters restricting me.

    What are you most proud of achieving since you left?

    I finally got my Bachelors degree in 2006. I had been in school off and on for years but I finally buckled down and got it.

    Is there anything you miss about life in the congregation?

    Picnics, get-togethers and meeting cute girls at the conventions.

    Red pill or blue pill? Do you regret waking up to reality at all?

    No regrets whatsoever.

    Did you become an atheist or transfer your faith elsewhere?

    I became an atheist because that's where the evidence led me.

    How do you now feel about religion in general?

    It's an anachronism that needs to go away. It served it's purpose in olden times but in today's global community it only serves to divide.

    Do you feel any guilt celebrating xmas or birthdays or doing any other JW "no-no"s?

    Because I live alone I still don't do much celebrating except for going to the occasional birthday or Christmas party. I don't feel a bit of guilt about it.

    Have you attended any face-to-face meetups of ex-JWs?

    Not yet. I would like to one day.

    Describe your circle of friends - mostly other ex-JWs or regular people?

    Just ordinary folks, co-workers, neighbors and their families. No ex JWs.

    Do you tell people about your JW past?

    Sometimes I mention it, if the subject of my past comes up. I try not to make a big deal of it, though.

    Do you feel animosity or pity toward current JWs?

    Pity mostly. They're stuck in a dead end religion and just spinning their wheels, doing busy work to no avail.

    How do you respond to witnesses when they call at your door?

    They haven't yet. (Says a lot about their enthusiasm for field service around here I suppose!)

    Storm the barricades or tend to the wounded? (do you favor activism or support)

    Storm the barricades! I try my best to fight ignorance. Unfortunately, I have learned that you can't fight against stupidity

    What do you think is the most effective approach to reaching people still in?

    Kindness and tact. They actually have to get themselves out. The best you can do is provide them a road map.

    Do you think the WTS can or should be destroyed, will continue on as-is or grow / change?

    They have to change...or die. An apocalyptic cult like the JWs has to do something when the apocalypse never comes. Time is against them.

    How has your life been impacted by your JW past?

    Hard to say, since before now I've never been anything but a JW.

    Are there things in your life you blame the WTS for?

    Not really

    JW upbringing - a protection or a curse?

    Probably both!

    How do you fill your time now it's not filled with meetings and field service?

    Reading and learning...and work!

    Do you still have an interest in JW beliefs and doctrines?

    Yes, because my kids are still in and I would like to get them out.

    How much of your time is still spent on JW related matters?

    Not much, just mostly time spent on this website.

    What do you think of the ex-JW community?

    These are a bunch of very smart people. They have been able to discern what's wrong with their current belief system and have had the courage to do something about it.

    Do you see yourself still being associated with the ex-JW community in 5 or 10 years time?

    Probably. Being a JW at one time will always be a part of my life, and it's always good to share this with kindred spirits.

    Do you fear the future?

    Not really. What comes, comes. There isn't much you can do about it anyway.

    What advice would you give to anyone starting the journey of leaving the WTS?

    Be true to your feelings. Don't stop learning. Always take that "Road less Traveled."

    What would you change in your life if you could go back and talk to yourself?

    I would say, "Don't get baptized! Stay in school! Don't marry that girl!"

    Do you have any regrets about life since you left?

    None whatever

    Can we read your life-story anywhere? (links to online or books)

    No. It's really not that exciting a story, which for me is probably a good thing because exciting stories usually read better than they live!

    Want to share your own story? Please use the Interview with an Apostate: Template and post it in the Personal Experiences & Reunions section with the title "Interview with an Apostate: [your name or alias]"

  • cofty
    cofty

    Thank you Cyrus.

  • Simon
    Simon

    I finally got my Bachelors degree in 2006. I had been in school off and on for years but I finally buckled down and got it.

    I also got my degree later, more of a personal achievement than a necessity to make me feel good.

    Thanks for sharing your story and good luck with your kids. If it helps any, it took me many years to wake up but my dad never gave up on me. Time and people change so don't give up.

  • Miss.Fit
    Miss.Fit

    Enjoyed learning more about you. How old are your children?

  • AllTimeJeff
    AllTimeJeff

    Thanks for sharing! Be patient with your kids. It can take a while. I wish you the best on that score.

  • CyrusThePersian
    CyrusThePersian
    Enjoyed learning more about you. How old are your children?

    My daughter is 31 and a regular pioneer. My son is 22 and an aspiring ministerial servant.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    While I stayed another decade, 1995's "Generation" change was my trigger too.

    Thanks for sharing and for telling some others: "Don't get baptized! Stay in school! Don't marry that girl!"

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