My JW Hubby ..... help please! I think he's about to break!

by sheshe 16 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  sheshe

  Hello Everyone,

  I just registered and am so excited about being led to this site! My hubby (soon to be hubby that is....should I back out now? ) is like a third generation JW. He has not attended regularly in like 10 years! Recently he started going back to the KH but not on a consistent basis. I went twice with him and I was so freaked out beforehand 'cos I was thinking the people there would just be different....I don't know why I thought they would have like 2 heads or 10 eyes or something......anyway, they were just like me! Silly, I know. But it was very, very, very boring and the music was horrible. We have a son and are to be married the end of the year. Our son is 14 months and I refuse to allow him to be indoctrinated into this belief system. My fiance does not argue with me though he does believe this is DA TROOF!

  So, last night he agreed, at my request, to do some bible study. I only want to study those things that separate our religious believes (i.e. WT being God's organization, paradise earth, Jesus being godlike, 144,000, etc). So he agreed. The fact that he's once again stopped going to the KH is a sign for me to really start talking with him - I just wish and pray the scales would just fall off of his (and is family's) eyes! I need a miracle!

  What should I say? What shouldn't I say? The fear of being disfellowshipped must haunt him. If my mom would ever disown be over some stuip organization I would slap her face! But that's me! I know he would hate being separated from his family. The fear of being disfellowshipped probably caused a lot of you guys to remain? True? Well, I just want him to get away from this organization! I want to save the entire Hall! And what's up with this NWT?

  Questions? Where should I begin? What topic first? Is a bible study a good idea? How did U get out? What was the straw for YOU?

  Thanks guys! Much love
• 

  jaffacake

  Hi

  Never been a JW but trying to get friend out. I'm excited for you.

  My advice is to avoid Bible study, at least for now. The history of the organisation, and what they have published damns them. 2 books are a must, Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom both by Raymond Franz.

  Have you seen the quotes website? http://quotes.watchtower.ca/index.htm

  I'm away now for a couple of days, but have word documents that might help if you pm me in a couple of days. Where are the chinks in his armour?
• 

  Mary

  Seeing as the year 1914 is the center of the Jehovah's Witnesses' universe, click on the link below that Sassy did a couple of years ago, PROVING from the bible alone that Jerusalem was not destroyed in 607 BCE. Without that date, the entire religion collapses: http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/10/55372/1.ashx
• 

  OldSoul

  sheshe,

  You have a Private Message. Click on the Inbox in the upper-left corner.
• 

  jaffacake

  Me again,

  My favourite Bible questions are the thread I just posted tonight headed (question for JWs only).

  Another favourite is why they dont follow Christ's great commission at end of Matthews gospel ie they stopped baptising in name of Father Son & Holy Spirit in 1985. Now its baptism into the visible oganisation. They also teach the New Testament is not for JWs (except the 8,000 remaining anointed)

  You're in good hands on this forum, back in a couple of days.

  Which gospel do they preach (not what Christ described as THIS good news of the kingdom) Please look at Galatians & Romans. (& Johns gospel)
• 

  garybuss

  Welcome!
  
  I tend to think that people who have a religion problem shouldn't study religion. They need to study the reasons for the religion. Start with listing all the assumptions and one by one challenge the assumptions. Keep the assumptions that stand up to objective reality. Discard all assumptions based only on magical thinking, aka faith.
  
  Research the sacred texts. Where did they come from? How were they preserved and why?
  
  Get educated first hand on the history, the manners, and the customs of the antique society the religious texts are based on. Challenge everything.
  
  If you both do this, Witnessism and religion won't be the issue any more. Usually when people are in conflict over religion, religion isn't the problem. Usually the problem is the problem and religion is a safe subject to argue about so they won't have to talk about the problem.
  
  If everything would be fine if you both read the same religious books, then you change. If you won't, then the issue isn't religion.
  
  Just my .02
  
  
• 

  Fatfreek

  My advice is to avoid Bible study, at least for now. The history of the organisation, and what they have published damns them. 2 books are a must, Crisis of Conscience and In Search of Christian Freedom both by Raymond Franz.

  Have you seen the quotes website? http://quotes.watchtower.ca/index.htm

  Excellent advice, Jaffacake.

  You will find much evidence in these, and especially from the Quotes site (simply quotations of what they, themselves, have said that prove their dishonesty.) And don't be put off by anyone that dishonest acts are merely mistakes and signs of imperfection. Dishonesty is INTENTIONAL telling of falsehoods. Someone once said that "the Watchtower's worst enemies are things they've said".
• 

  hubert

  Welcome to the board, Sheshe.

  I sent you a p.m. (Personal Message).

  Hubert
• 

  AuntieJane

  Welcome sheshe. I definitely say DO NOT get married until you have a resolution on this important issue. This board is full of sad stories of JW's and spouses who were out when they married and went back in. If you have a son already, don't be in a big hurry. It only gets worse when you have kids.

  You will be wise to stick around here for a long time; people are great to help here! I'm not a JW either but have some family in.

  Read, read, read. And as far as a Bible study...don't get into one by yourself with him. find a non-denominational church and call and ask them about their bible groups. You will probably get frustrated trying to "convince" him, and believe me...he has been trained in cult thinking and looks at the Bible differently, he could have you believing that crap the way they do. That's what happened in my family, my nephew got my niece to sit down and next thing I knew, she was a JW too.

  Good luck!

  AuntieJ
• 

  jaffacake

  Research how they claimed to be a prophet of God (which they later denied) yet every one of their many predictions failed. They even quote how Deuteronomy shows how to easily test for a false prophet. Then apply the test!

  Romans chapter 13:1 and the doctrinal changes from the 1800s, 1929, 1962, and the present, were a major breakthrough for me last week. The elder had to admit to no information from God. This is linked to the alternative service issue, when they deliberately let JWs rot in prison for years, just to save doctrinal face. They were the only religion who wrongly interpreted Bible. Finallt changed policy in 1996.