WTS Idiotic view of Masturbation
This is a must read! Many months ago, our famous humorist-par-excellence, Farkel, posted on H20 one of the best comedy presentations on the WTS view of Masturbation. I searched the H20 Archives, but could not find it. So, while we await Farkel’s comments, I have lifted some gems from the now world renown article, ”Breaking Free of Self-Abuse - Why? How?” as published in the September 15, 1973 Watchtower, Pages 564-569:
I will show the Watchtower comments in Blue, followed by some of my own comments. Please read all of this, as you will not be disappointed - I promise! There is just so much WTS nonsense, I could not resist quoting almost all of it! To start with, just think about the interesting Sub-Titles:
A Most Common Practice - Really? Please do tell!
What are the Habit’s Effects? - Eyes will go blind?
How We are Made - This should be enlightening!
The Christian View of Masturbation - Yes, the Bible is explicit here!
Prevention and Cure - Break out the Chastity Belts!
Masturbation was once quietly discussed only in private circles, as “secret sin” or “solitary vice.” Today it is fast becoming a common household word.
Why yes, we were just discussing masturbation at work the other day during break! A household word! I will keep that in mind.
Dictionaries describe it as ‘the act of rubbing one’s genital organs until excitement is climaxed by orgasm, but without intercourse.
Oh really? “Organs”? What dictionary is that? You mean I have more than one genital organ that can get excited? Where is it?
The Chicago Daily News reads” “Masturbation Not Physically Harmful.”
Thank Gawd! But what issue of the Daily News? And where in Illinois it is published? We have the Sun Times, Tribune, and Daily Herald (which has always been the Daily Herald for 129 years. No one around here has heard of the Daily News, at least not as a major Chicago paper.
8/16/01, Correction: I talked to a life long resident of the Chicago-Land metro area. He said that the Daily News was one of four City-wide papers up until the mid-1960s: The Sun-Times, Tribune, Americana, and Daily News. The Daily News and the Americana folded in the mid to late 1960s, leaving just the Sun-Times and Tribune. The Daily News was known as the Blue Collar paper, and was of medium credibility, as far as he recalled. The 1973 Watchtower, which quoted the Daily News, did so about 5 years after the paper folded. This still leaves the date and page unspecificed. This makes checking source references much more difficult. If I get anymore information, I will revise this correction.
It is also reported that a “prominent sex expert,” during a sex-education class in school, told the students to “go ahead and masturbate.”
Can you imagine that, the teacher telling the kids right in class to do it? I would love to see the context of this unspecified source!
A pamphlet widely distributed in the classrooms in of France recommends masturbation, saying it “can fill the emptiness of an hour’s class or a boring evening.”
Really? So France is now our sexual guide? Dr. Ruth where are you? So, does this mean that JWs can ‘spank the monkey’ during the Service Meeting or Watchtower study? Could it be that is why so many JWs get up to take walks outside or go to the bathroom? Again, I would love to see this unspecified source.
Many religious leaders also encourage the practice. For example, a report overwhelmingly adopted by the General Assembly of the 3.1 million members of the United Presbyterian Church says, in part: “We find no evidence for any theological, psychological or medical strictures against masturbation per se. ... There is even some argument for the positive values of masturbation.”
What are ‘strictures? Sounds painful to me. Looks like our Presbyterian buds are rational. Sounds like the 6 million member JW religion needs to hook up with the 3.1 million Presbyterian masturbators. But, again another unspecified report.
Look at the statistics: “Every serious statistical study that we have shows clearly that ... at least ninety-five per cent of boys and young men between thirteen and twenty-five years of age pass through periods of habitual masturbation of varying lengths,” says one authority on the subject.
The rest of the five per cent and anyone over twenty-five are liars. Again, another unspecified source. Your are doing good WTS.
Now what do you think? Do you agree that because it is a very common thing, almost a ‘universal’ practice, that this makes masturbation a natural, normal function of the body?
What a red herring or straw man this is! No one ever stated that it is a normal function of the body. It is something that a person chooses to do, so it is a function of the mind, heart, hormones working together in conjunction with the body. But, read on, as this gets better ...
The common cold is quite universal but this certainly does not make it normal or natural, does it?
You WTS guys have got to be kidding with this comparison! The common cold is very natural because it is the body’s natural reaction to a very common natural virus that Gawd created - you idiots!
In the nineteenth century, and until relatively recently, it was thought that masturbation would ruin one’s physical health, causing such things as pasty complexion, exhaustion, insomnia, tuberculosis, sterility, feeblemindedness, deformity of the genitals and other physical harm.
Ah, yes, 19th Century medical opinion. Is that what plagues the GB? Exhaustion from masturbating 100 times a day? Feeblemindedness? Oh yes, we can see this in your policies. Again, no sources as to where such opinions of the 19th century are documented. The boys in writing are batting 1000!
However, today it is well established that masturbation does not cause these things.
Oh, that is good news! Again, not that I do not believe you, but what sources support this statement?
Only in extreme cases where males masturbate excessively are they infertile or have semen of poor quality.
Ahhh ... still wanting to push those 19th century medical opinions I see. Poor quality semen from excessive monkey spanking! How would you guys know? Again, no sources cited. Still batting 1000!
One authority sums up the medical opinion, saying: “There is no scientific evidence that masturbation is biologically harmful.”
But, I thought you guys just said that it could still cause infertility and poor semen quality. Now you quote an authority that just disputes your 19th claim! I am confused here. And, once again, your source is not specified - still batting 1000! You guys are good!
If not biologically harmful, what about the mental, emotional and moral health of the masturbator?
Ahhh ... Now we are getting somewhere! The moral aspects - a classic Watch Tower concern!
Says the Encyclopedia Americana: “The most modern attitude toward masturbation is that the deleterious effects so often observed ... come not from any injury to the body but from the guilty feelings of those who abuse themselves and from the tendency it has to remove them from the true relations with their fellows.”
Remove them from the true relations with their fellows? What edition of the encyclopedia Americana did that appear? What is possibly meant by this? Now, a half-specified source. Batting 995 ... a slight improvement!
Most persons will acknowledge that, actually, few parents take the time or interest to discuss masturbation with their children.
Wait a minute! I am confused! I thought that you guys just said in the opening of your article that ‘masturbation’ is a “household” word these days. How do you guys know what most persons will acknowledge on this? What is your source for such a study? Still batting 997.
So, then, why is it that the young boy (or girl) who engages in masturbation for the first time nevertheless feels a sense of guilt, or self-accusation? Why is it that by far the majority who engage in the practice do so in a secret, furtive way?
Do so in secret? What do you expect, that they will do this in public, on the street corner while waiting for the school bus? And again, where is the study that shows that ‘first-timers’ feel guilty? Now Batting 999 for lack of source references.
Masturbation (like homosexuality) ignores or bypasses that natural arrangement.
Okay, so we got the idea that this is not the regular means to get it on.
So, while many psychiatrists and doctors make it appear that guilt feelings about masturbation are attributable entirely to one’s ‘social indoctrination and upbringing,’ the opposite may well be the case. That is, it is more likely that, where there is an absence of such feeling of guilt, this is due to the individual’s previously having been influenced by others to believe that the practice of masturbation is really “all right,” “normal,” even “beneficial.” In reality modern propaganda tries to stifle or undermine God-given conscience.
But, you guys just got through proving with your unspecified sources that every one, even first-time masturbators feel guilt, and this inspite of the fact that no parent talks to their kids about it ... so how can you now make the opposite argument?
However, to view the matter with greater insight, it is helpful to understand certain things about the way we humans are formed - physically, mentally and emotionally.
I can hardly wait for your expert understanding of how we are made. Do enlighten us - please!
Hormones, secreted by the pituitary gland, gonads and other glands, are at work causing these changes. For a boy, this causes his testicles to begin producing sperm cells. These pass into a tube and from there into internal storage vessels known as the seminal vesicles, alongside the bladder. When these storage vessels are full, the sexual interest of the male may be more susceptible to stimulation.
And if you are an unmarried JW male virgin Pioneering all the way to Bethel Service, by the time your reach 50 years of age, your balls explode! Again, no source references, but I will let this pass ... still batting 999.
It is natural therefore for a healthy, normal male to feel a measure of sexual ‘drive.’ The marriage arrangement provides the means for satisfying such sexual desire.
That is nice to know. But aren’t you guys going to discuss female development and needs?
But what of those not married? Is masturbation the only means - short of fornication - for relieving the pressure of such desire? And if masturbation is not indulged in, will the buildup of semen have some damaging effect?
As I suggested above - your balls explode! Still no mention of women in this discussion!
The answer to these questions is, No. There are other ways to reduce or relieve sexual pressure.
Oh please do tell! For shame you dirty boys ... let’s hear about these other ways!
One is “sublimation” - that is, redirecting the pressure toward various physical and mental activities.
Oh, sublim ... what? So a guy is supposed to shoot his wad toward various activities? okay, I’m listening.
What of buildup of semen in the body? There is no danger of this reaching the point of causing any physical damage.
That is good news! Glad to know that our balls won’t explode!
And, in reality, sexual interest is governed far more by what the individual entertains in his mind.
Ahhhhh ... back to the core issue ... Watchtower mind-control. But what makes the ‘mind’ think about sex? Didn’t you say earlier that the pituitary gland (in the brain) secrets the hormones necessary to cause male sexual ‘drive?’ So which came first, the thought or the hormone?
Then, too, the male body normally reduces the amount of semen through periodic nocturnal or nighttime emissions during sleep.
Go on! Just sat it! Wet Dreams! And how are ‘wet dreams’ all that much different than an act of masturbation? Again no sources references ... and no mention yet of female sexual interests, drive, or hormones. Hummmmm ... wonder why?
Less than 5 percent of nineteen-year-old boys, for example, are said not to experience these.
Could this be the 5 percent that reportedly do not masturbate while 95 percent do? Again, not source references and no mention of females.
(Though one does not have such emissions, this does not necessarily indicate any sexual deformity.)
Wheeeew! Boy, was I worried.
What occurs with the average male is that, during the night as the bladder fills with urine, pressure develops on the adjoining seminal vesicles. This may periodically trigger involuntary emission of semen during one’s sleep.
Now I get it! That must be why Bethelite men love to drink so much! You are trying to fill your bladders so you can have Wet Dreams, cause you ain’t getting any through ‘other’ organizationally disapproved or approved means, like spanking the monkey or through the marriage arrangement! Ahhh ... wow, the Boys in Writing do share some good insight. Where is any discussion of women in all this?
Explaining why such nocturnal emissions are called “wet dreams,” and are often accompanied by irrational, strange and absurd dreaming, sociology professor Herbert J. Miles writes:
Now you finally called it a ‘wet dream’ but only because you are about to cite your first real source reference. Cool ...
Herbert J. Miles writes: “The increasing need for emptying the bladder causes the person to move gradually out of sleep where the conscious mind is at rest toward active mental consciousness, that is waking. During this gradual shift from sleep toward waking the mind is in a kind of ‘twilight zone’ in which the subconscious mind is operating. Ideas and thoughts are mixed, confused, and may move swiftly from one idea, experience, or act to another. These jumbled, topsy-turvy, indiscriminate ideas may involve sexual thoughts or activities that would not be tolerated if the conscious mind were directing thought.” - Sexual Understanding Before Marriage, pp. 160, 161.
Oh please refrain me! Gawd! All the source references in the world on sexuality, and you pick some sociology professor to quote. Nevertheless, he said some cool stuff. Lots of information for weasel-minded Elders to justify ‘getting it on’ while keeping the Rank & File ignorant of these fine historical articles. Well, your source reference batting average improved back to a 995. Let’s see what use you make of this quote!
There is no need, then, for the individual to feel guilty because of such emissions or the dreams contributing to them - unless he knows that he had been letting his thoughts dwell immorally or in an unhealthy way on sexual matters.
Ohhhhhh maaaan! Thought control again! I thought that the professor was talking about how the mind jumps around and the subconscious mind is calling the shots, while the conscious mind is at rest? Now you guys are saying that we might even be responsible for a sexual thought while in our sleep in the event we happened to think about sex while still awake! Yikes! I am screwed!!! Again, where are the women in all this discussion?
But, is not masturbation more effective and satisfying in relieving sexual tension than these nocturnal emissions? No; for instead of a simple and immediate release of tension, the masturbator finds that his whole nervous system is thrown into a high state of excitement as tension is built up due to the self-stimulation.
Oh please!!!!!!!! ROTFLMAO!!!!! I have to stop typing for a minute. ..... Okay, got my composure. Let’s continue with the WTS fine spiritual food - meat in due season - Jehovah’s progressive light of truth.
Afterward this may leave him with a feeling of nervous frustration and dissatisfaction. Yet he soon has a compelling desire to repeat the act. It is a vicious cycle that is hard to break and that gives no genuine satisfaction.
ROTFLMAO !!! ..... Paaaa Leeeeeasssse stop it! Come on!!! Are you guys serious!!! What do you do all day at Bethel? You certainly don’t seem to have time to do some valid research. You must sit around jacking-off all day long, and you “can’t get no - satis-fac shun!” Still, no mention of women ... curious silence about the opposite sex.
That masturbation is abnormal and unnatural is also indicated by the fact that abnormal, mentally deranged people are notorious masturbators.
Do you Watchtower writers have any idea how you scare the hell out of minors who read this crap! COME ON!!! Mentally deranged? Try looking in the mirror you idiots! No source references for your scare tactics! Well, except what comes next ... first mention of
women ...
The Bremerton Sun (Washington) states that many mentally disturbed priests and nuns are chronic masturbators.
GIVE ME A BREAK! I have to get some coffee and have a smoke, cause I can’t type any more of this for a while ... brb ...okay, I’m back.... Again the source reference does not state the date and page of the article. So their batting average at making poor use of references is still a 998.
It is general knowledge that today people of the world, including a large percentage of churchgoers, being “past all moral sense,” encourage and recommend the unnatural practice of masturbation.
That’s right, just go to church on Sunday, and find the pastor preaching to the masses about the benefits of masturbation! Again, no source reference for such a claim!
True, the words “masturbation” and “self-abuse” are not in the Bible. The Mosaic law speaks of “emission of semen,” but as Bible commentators point out, the reference is to involuntary nocturnal emissions, not self-induced ejaculations. (Lev. 15:16) However, there are Bible principles that adequately cover the subject of masturbation.
I can hardly wait to see these ‘rpinciples’ that adequately cover this subject.
For example, Colossians 3:5,6 says: “Deaden, therefore, your body members that are upon the earth as respects fornication, uncleanness, sexual appetite, hurtful desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. On account of these things the wrath of God is coming.”
Okay, so the body members that are on the earth ... what is that? My feet touch the earth, but my other parts stay well above the ground. And you are suggesting that Gawd kills masturbators! Come on! Pahhhh leeeeze!
As we have seen, masturbation is indeed a “hurtful desire.” It is also “uncleanness,” for it is an immoral practice, and this explains why the masturbator generally is ashamed of himself and hides his repugnant act from the sight of others.
When I go to the bathroom to pee, I also hide this from others. Does that make it immoral? You say, ‘As we have seen’ ... as though you proved something> Nonsense! You proved nothing boys!
What about the “sexual appetite” of the masturbator? Is it ‘deadened’? Or does he constantly feed and enliven his sexual craving, yes, even to the point of “planning ahead for the desires of the flesh,” contrary to the Bible’s advice? - Rom. 13:14
How would you clean guys know? In between writing this crap, you sit around jacking-off, planning ahead for your wet dreams. Why did you not also cite studies that show that men think about sex every 15 seconds? Ah ha! And I am not going to share my source references either ... there.
... ‘idolatry’ ... This would apply here, for the masturbator’s affection is diverted away from the Creator and is bestowed upon a coveted object, in this case his genitals, which take on undue importance. This practice then could border on idolatry, as in the ancient practice of phallic worship so hated by God.
Okay, so now you are saying that masturbators ‘worship’ their penis? No mention of women yet, other than nutty nuns. Gawd! When will this end?
”Autoerotism” literally means self-love or erotic love of oneself. ... For this reason some psychologists have labeled self-gratifying masturbation as narcissism, after the Greek mythological god Narcissus, who fell in love with his own image, to his destruction. Did not the Bible warn that “men will be lovers of themselves” in these “last days”? - 2 Tim. 3:1,2.
What psychologists? Who? What are your references? And how does that compare with your earlier contention that modern psychologists state that masturbation is not harmful either physically or mentally? Greek Gods again? I knew you would find a way to paganize this. Your batting average is back to 1000 on this one. And, again, still no mention of women.
Cultivating singleness as “eunuchs on account of the kingdom of the heavens” has many advantages in this time of the end.
But, but, but ... I thought you said that marriage has many advantages when it comes to relieving sexual tension. Now you recommend being eunuchs, no sex, ever! And even your ‘wet dreams’ are suspect cause you might have a sexual thought during the day that could lead to nocturnal emissions ... but these are better than masturbation because they are immediate releases and not the exhaustive process of masturbation? I’m getting confused! How would the Society answer? ...
But let no one think that resorting to masturbation is the way to do this. Rather, self-control is the key to making a success of singleness.
Self-control ... wait until I am 50 and my balls will explode!
’But won’t suppressing sexual emotions damage my personality and wreck my nervous system?’ someone may ask.
Who would ever asked such a question? Now, read on, as this gets even better ...
Answers the book Why Wait Till Marriage?: “There is no evidence that self-control hurts your sex life. ... It is the fellow or the girl who goes around with his emotions all unbuttoned who is in the greatest danger. The self-controlled person can bear to wait.”
Wait a minute!!! They are not talking about masturbation! The book is only talking about heterosexual sex before marriage. Emotions all unbuttoned? When was this book published and what page or chapter ... again, poor referencing. The Watch Tower solution to all this? Read on:
And this is no great problem if one has God’s spirit, for the fruitage of the spirit includes “self-control.” With self-control the Christian can avoid all forms of self-abuse, and in turn reap many dividends - mental, emotional and spiritual benefits that are for more satisfying than the death-dealing “works of the flesh.” - Gal. 5:19-23.
Ohhhh, I see. All forms of self-abuse (masturbation). Just how many forms are there? And death-dealing? Another scare tactic to frighten the beegeebers out of JW young men and women?
Now for the ‘Prevention and Cure’ - this gets even better!
If one understands the cause, it is easier to implement the prevention and cure of a bad habit.
Okay ... enlighten us, as we are eager to understand your great wisdom!
Did you know, for example, that mothers and fathers who stroke the genitals of their fretful babies to keep them quiet are unwittingly encouraging them to become masturbators later on?
You don’t say! Really? I thought that such fondling would land them in jail! Come on! Boys in Writing - what kind of things do you do while sitting around spanking the monkey all day long? Is this what you call sound advice? Give me a break!!! Any source references? Starting kind of young aren’t you?
Now comes real mention of girls too ...
Boys and girls may start to play with their private parts during puberty and, not receiving any counsel against this, the first thing they know they are “hooked” on the habit. And if some know nothing about such self-abuse before entering high school, the chances are they will learn of it from either fellow students or the teachers themselves.
NO! But, I thought you said that ‘masturbation’ was a household word! But, I guess those French pamphlets must have finally made their way to America, and now teachers are instructing kids to masturbate! Yes, and Santa Clause gives out rubbers for Christmas
presents too ... get serious!
Investigations indicate that a high percentage of masturbation is not due so much from a buildup of erotic pressure as from the same kinds of tensions and anxiety that cause insomnia.
Source references please! Insomnia? No more Tonight Show with Jay Leno for me.
Youths and many older people who are tense with emotional difficulties resort to masturbation as an escape route from their physical and emotional discomforts - a sort of pacifier or tranquilizer, they think, to take their minds off of their worries. So, too, persons suffering from boredom, unemployed persons and prisoners, especially if they have been on drugs, often masturbate.
You guys are a hoot! You have just about everybody on earth masturbating! Geezzzzeee ... and again, what about women, and where are your source references? What do you suggest to break this evil death-dealing habit?
Many things are suggested. Avoid keeping company either with pornographic literature or with those who have loose morals.
Stay away from JWs, especially JW pedophiles, and Watchtower publications. Again, where are your source references? Okay, next suggestion ...
Stay busy with working hard, physically and mentally.
Oh I see, selling magazines? So that I am too bushed to whack the wanker.
Do not let problems build up tensions, which cause anxieties that depress the mind.
So, I tell my bank to hold back on late fees on my car payment cause it might make me masturbate. And, so on ...
So, at nighttime arrange to share a bedroom with other members of the family.
So, are you saying that a man ask his wife to have the children come in and sleep with them so he won’t masturbate? Or do you mean that a teenager should bunk in with his brothers and sisters and ask them to stop him should he has sudden tensions that make him want to spank the monkey? Where do you guys get your sick ideas anyway?
Sleep on the side, not on the back or stomach. These are a few suggestions for arranging the daily routine.
What are you saying? If I sleep on my stomach, I might masturbate? Come on!
Some persons find it most difficult to discontinue the habit abruptly. So, when they occasionally relapse - usually in a state of semiconscious sleep - they develop deep feelings of guilt and of being unworthy of Jehovah’s mercy.
Wait a minute! You guys just said above that in this semi-sleep one need not feel guilty, and now you say they will feel guilty. They get their guilt from you guiys. WOW! I am more confused and frustrated and anxious than ever ... whoops! Ahhh ... what do you now suggest? And will you ever talk about what women can do?
For these reasons it is not only helpful but often advisable to seek the aid and encouragement of a Christian elder.
Ah, yes, the highly qualified, trained, and competent JW Elders ... by the way, have you ever read my justice series? Okay, now for you girls ... READ ON ... this is GOOD!
When a girl has the problem she may want to approach either an elder or a mature, respected Christian sister for help.
Ahhhh ... now you girls are finally brought into this at the very end of the article ... and what are you encouraged to do? Go to an elder! Yes, he will really help you! What else can a JW do to break this evil habit?
Another motivating force to help one to break the habit may be the desire to be of greater service in the Christian Congregation. If a man is “reaching out” for such privileges he should note that one of the requirements for Christian eldership is
‘self-control.’
Why YES! Giving No. 1 Instruction Talks always relieved my sexual tensions along with going door-to-door! Did I ever mention the time I got an erection while giving one of my first Public Talks? I will save that for another post. It is hilarious. Anyway, what of an Elder who has a little ‘slip’ and spanks the monkey by accident? The Watchtower answers this way:
True, one who already occupies such a position may have a temporary bout with the problem and, if he fights it and gains the victory, he need not feel disqualified.
Ohhhh ... so an Elder can once in a while have a temporary ‘bout’ and not be disqualified from his position because of this death-dealing, God disapproved, and evil habit? And this same Elder is going to counsel thosde young JWE girls about not masturbating either. Yes, way Cool ... but what of those who continue the habit ... you know, several times a day, each day of the week?
But the habitual practicer of masturbation, lacking self-control, is in danger of succumbing to still more serious wrongs.
Ah, yes, like a drug, one will need bigger and more frequent fixes. Yes, try sexual intercourse - wow - now that is a real sin ... and you have lots of juicy articles for that one. Now, I see why your religion is so incompetent and dangerous. This is an example of
shear stupidity, ignorance, and mind-control. You guys manipulate people right down to their ‘wet dreams.’ - Amazing