Big Boys Don't Cry! Well that's what we are told anyway! And I guess this convention is widespread in many cultures. It appears there is an unwritten rule that men should show less emotion than women - and most certainly should not cry. This is the role model of so many screen heroes like Bruce Willis and Clint Eastwood who have played characters that generally show little in emotion.
But you may recall that after the Gulf War General Norman Schwartzkopf appeared on a US talk show and after a number of personal questions…..he broke down in tears. The interviewer was surprised but the General basically said there were appropriate occasions when he would cry in front of his men. There were times when he would not, but when he did cry he was a father figure and it was appropriate for him to act as an emotional focus point for his men.
I think in that way he was able to deal with sad realities with complete acceptance of the loss sustained without minimizing the situation to the great appreciation of his men who knew he was like them, with the same feelings and the same values. Not something you often find with those in power and detached from the rank and file.
From a scientific view, tears are made up of water, oils and other proteins. Analysis of these substances has shown that some are associated with long term unhappiness when they build up in the body. Guess what? When you cry these substances are removed from the body these substances that make you unhappy. So a good cry may make you feel better…….even if you are a big boy!
ISP