I was raised in the JW religion but struggled with it. I almost got baptized in 2011 but realized they were a cruel lot in some of the most basic of ways. It seemed wrong to pray for the end to come all the time. I have been an artistic person all my life and have had a difficult time fitting in with the community of witnesses. I think I may have done it to gain the love of my family. It never happened though, I was never able to conform to the awful drudgery of constant guilt and fear. I could find no joy in this religion and found they crushed the life out of me in everyway. My family will have nothing to do with me now as I am .......can't recall the exact phrase....I was seeded or something but the seeds did not take....What a laugh. I actually have quite a green thumb and have no trouble growing anything from plants to drawings or paintings. I can't take the coldness of this religion and had to get way in the end. It made me feel suicidal. Really.