If WTS was a person ...

by ljwtiamb 1 Replies latest watchtower beliefs

  • ljwtiamb
    ljwtiamb

    While recently researching some info on personal relationships, I realized that if WTS was a person, being a JW would be clearly classified as an abusive relationship.

    HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP- This is a good dating relationship for now.
    • Both are feeling good about self, feel good individually whether in a relationship or not Shared interests, shared power and decision making, shared values
    • Can disagree and solve problems without verbal or physical abuse
    • Relationship is one part of a well-rounded life of friends, family, school, sports, hobbies, Spiritual life
    • Both enjoy the company of other people and support individual interests and friendships of their boyfriend/girlfriend


    UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP- This may have been a good thing once, but is no longer a well-balanced and enjoyable dating relationship- it is time to cut the ties to this relationship and move on...
    • One or both are not enjoying the relationship much - lots of drama or boredom, not much fun
    • Not many shared interests or values, or differ on important interests and values
    • Can disagree and solve problems fairly, but there are a lot of disagreements and problems
    • One partner sees relationship as much more important than the other one does- one is getting "too serious" or too dependent
    • One partner has violated trust or hurt the other in a way that is hard to repair
    • Have just grown apart- not very interested in each other any more- its more of a habit than anything else
    • Feel sadness, hurt, anger, and failure about breaking up, but open to the possibility of new relationships

    ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP- Alarm bells going off. Someone is getting hurt and will probably need help with safety planning and support in order to safely break up.
    • One has decreasing self-esteem since entering this relationship.
    • The interests, values, desires of one person dominate the relationship.
    • One is using name-calling, threats, intimidation, insults, manipulation, physical or sexual abuse to force the other one to do things.
    • One or both are becoming more secretive and isolated from family, friends, and social activities, etc.
    • One feels entitled to be in control, decide how things will be, get his or her own way all the time, wants the other to agree and comply.
    • One person feels more afraid, is hurt physically or emotionally, adjusts behavior to accommodate the other, is "walking on eggshells" not to upset the other. The other may be monitoring or stalking to know every move.
    So whaddya think?

  • inbyathread
    inbyathread

    Thank you for this. Hope you don't mind my copying this for some friends of mine.

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