How do you help someone who is depressed?

by desib77 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • desib77
    desib77

    How do you help someone who is depressed? What do you say to them? What if this person's life really is horrible and they can't get therapy or medication to help?

    Any suggestions?

  • Undaunted Danny
  • stillajwexelder
    stillajwexelder

    What do you say to them?

    You do not - you LISTEN - have a hearing empathetic ear - nod now again, try tosay as little as possible -be there for them - In my experience it really helps.

  • desib77
    desib77

    That is so tough to do.......it is my nature to want to fix this person's problems...and yet, I feel helpless.

  • Celia
    Celia

    Desib: are you talking about me ?

  • desib77
    desib77
    Desib: are you talking about me ?

    No...but I would cheer you up if I could, too...... (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Celia)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))) Does that help???????

  • Celtic
    Celtic

    Just be there whenever you are able to for them, give them a listening ear, be a mate to them, it's simple really.

    You're probaly doing all you can already. You take care too of your own feelings, mind they don't get hoovered from you.

  • ball.
    ball.

    There is no simple answer because there are so many states of mind a person can be in, the word depressed doesn't really cover it all. As someone said, listening is good.

    But there is a very good point in the book "Mankind's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl, where he gives an example of explaining to someone suffering from grief how their lost loved one would have wanted them to go on through life, and it changed everything for them. I have lent the book to someone so I can't post the exact words, although I would like to.

    My point is, you can help someone by reasoning with them, even though depression can sometimes seem illogical.

    I know someone who suffers from obsesive compulsive disorder, and when their were riots, she was scared, depressed and wanted to kill herself.

    So my logic said to her, "What is the worst thing that could possibly happen to you because of these riots which have become the focus of your mind?" And she thought about it and said, "I suppose I could die."

    And then she realised that trying to kill herself because of her worst possible fears was illogical.

    Of course, you should always advise people to consult a doctor also ... my disclaimer.

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