Hi Ttwho,
I was concerned by your response to my post about the paranormal because it seems you have suffered more than your share wierdness. I feel a bit guilty because I said talking about this stuff is "fun". It is alot like telling ghost stories around the campfire so there is an element of entertainment(fun) but I realize that it's not always fun for the persons who suffered through these types of events. In your case, these attacks happen so much that it's gone beyond a little scare once in a while and into a health threatening problem. I was very glad to hear that once you quit the Watch Tower Society and its superstitious obsessions the frequency of your attacks has deminished. I think this is evidence of an improved mental state because of the reduced stress from not being an active JW. It also seems you have begun to feel the relief that comes from reducing your hold on the traditional god concept.
I show my own atheistic leanings here but my life has been much better without worrying about God. I figure that if God was real He, She, or It wouldn't really require my worship or anxiety about worship to exist anyway. Humans seek to have power over Nature(God?) so we invented the concept that God( the gods) demands our worship and acknowledgment in order to be whole and that we, in return, recieve comfort, protection,favours....in short, some measure of control over the chaotic Universe we are tossed about in. Logically, if God exists as an all powerful(omnipotent) Creator, then we(and our beliefs) are certainly not necessary to the maintainence of His existance. A truely merciful and all powerful God would require nothing from us and we would be free to explore and discover His Universe unharrased and free of wondering what He might require of us. We are afraid of the unknown so we invent a God concept which has what we do not,knowledge of all things(omniprescience). We think that He can be bribed into revealing some of this knowledge to us if only we believe in and worship Him correctly, hence we gain some control for ourselves. This concept seems idiotic to me. As if God could be bribed, as if He needed our attention to be complete. This human madness has lead to disaster on a societal scale and mental illness on an individual level. Nightmares and monsters obsess us because we are unsure we have God's attention as we spin out of control in this demon haunted Universe of random chance and sudden death.
I have found comfort and sleep much better knowing that the Gods of the Watch Tower, Jehovah & Satan, do not exist and that if there is a God at all He is neutral toward me like this chaotic Universe because I am blissfully unimportant and therefor completely free of mythical conflicts betwen good and evil. It seems strange that I should live with less fear and anxiety now that I have rejected the Watch Tower and even traditional Christianity but this is truely the case. Reason and logic combat fear and ignorance and I embrace my place falling through the void of the Universe aware that this would be the case despite my strongest beliefs to the contrary. Belief in God or Satan cannot make them real nor less real. They either are or they are not and I can do nothing about it. Perhaps I am left alone by the demonic hoards because I am not obsessed with their reality. They either are or they are not. If they are powerful and rebellious "spirit sons of God" then I am logically powerless to prevent their attacks anyway if God allows them free reign. To me reciting God's name is the same as wearing garlic, sacrificing chickens, or howling at the Moon in order to keep the demons away. These acts of desparation are illusional games of control to make us feel more powerful and in control in case God has forgotten to protect us and we must bribe Him to remember just like a human policeman. This deminishes God if such a being exists.
I say all this to comfort myself and others who have suffered the mental stress of being pawns in the Watch Tower's imaginary "battle for Universal Sovereignty" where the fate of the Universe weighs heavily on our shoulders as Jehovah and Satan fight it out proving to us who is worthy to rule. What utter nonsense! Yet I once stressed myself to the point of illness convinced of the reality of this insanity. Ttwho, you too are now on your way to a better life. I don't know all the causes of your attacks but the fact that they occur less often is proof enough that you are on the right path to freeing yourself from your own delusions which were fueled by the Watch Tower and its power hungry abuse of its frieghtened and weakened victims taken easily from the traditional Christian establishment's own power games.