by weskerbouts 36 Replies latest jw experiences
Recent guidelines for elders have and from platform indicate that if you are into "extreme" forms of porn then you CAN be DF'd. I'd find it very hard to believe that an elder body would DF for porn unless you were either into kiddie porn OR they don't like you and wanted you gone for some reason.
Extreme forms of porn according to recent ASSembly:
Bondage (this is "extreme" nowadays?)
Kiddie porn
Scat/snuff
Welcome, Weskerbouts...!!
I was gratified to read that your immediate family are NOT Jehovah's Witnesses. That means that you WON'T have to deal with the ugly effects of the Jehovah's Witnesses' requirement to SHUN DISFELLOWSHIPPED FAMILY MEMBERS...
I would suggest that you use the "search" function on this site and look up keywords regarding issues that concern you.
Zid - the board's She-Devil
Oh, about the porn...
Pornography is actually far, far older than the bible.
Many forms of worship of earth goddesses incorporated pornography - well, what the uptight worshippers of Middle-Eastern gods would call "pornography" - into their rites and symbols...
Some of the oldest representations of goddesses are over two hundred thousand years old - and are representations of the forms of well-rounded, naked women...
The bible, on the other hand, was only written within the last 3,500 years or so - and was written by Bronze-Age Middle-Eastern males...
Ask yourself, which is the OLDEST form of worship, between the two?
Zid
Welcome to the forum, weskerbouts.
Don't wait for miracles, just stop ignoring things that don't make sense. They don't make sense for a reason, the reason is usually that they simply don't make sense, not because you are stupid, or need someone who gets messages from invisible space creatures to guide you.
Forget religion for a while and go and get that education you have been putting off. While you are at it, grab some books from the library that teach critical thinking skills and unlearn the mental blocking techniques that the Watchtower taught you. This is an important step. Without good critical thinking skills you could end up joining the next cult that just happens to bump into you just after you have prayed for a miracle.
Cheers
Chris
Oh for goodness sakes. Look, I don't know that much about porn, and I know even less about porn addiction---but it sounds like you considered it a problem. So you reached out for help. And what did you get? Certainly not help. This should tell you everything you need to know about this cult. And as has been pointed out, JW's have deep roots with the Adventists----so why trade one for the other?
Look, like Slimboy said, unless this involves kiddie porn, or snuf (I don't know what scat is---like I said, don't know much) (which if so, get help immediately) this was really an overreaction and a group of assholes turning their back on you when you needed them most. Education---VERY good choice. It's good to have you here. You'll accumulate a lot of helpful information. JWfacts is excellent!
So while I don't know the specifics of your addiction, and I don't want to brush it off in case it is something violent, I am hesitant to say it's not as bad as it seems. However I can say this, it is never better to deal with things alone. Whatever it is, it's best to be able to talk about it. You will never get that with a bunch of window washers with a superior sense of their importance, because they have been told they are princes in the earth---and who have absolutely no relevant training. You've been given a huge gift. Take advantage of it. No one want's to have emotional issues treated by janitors. Find the help you need.
NC
Please read "Crisis of Conscience" by Ray Franz. (PDF available at www.commentarypress.com)
There is nothing to gain by speaking with the elders about any private matters.
First, let me say that I am not condemning you for your problem. I would advise you to get serious about adressing it. Why do I say that? Because my sister dealt with her husband for 28 years and his addiction to porn and then getting her to dress up and act it out for him. It damaged her emotionally, alcohol was the only way she could deal with it. He was an elder, and an elder's son. Both their sons are also addicted to porn. And I'm not talking about extreme types of porn. They just can't stop.
Porn separates you and desensitizes you and makes it difficult to connect to a significant other and see them as a real person. For that reason I would strongly encourage you to do something about it. The possibility of you ending up alone is very real. My sister divorced that man and is on the other side of the country. She is an acoholic, struggles with guilt and shame. She sought help and was told to be a better wife and then he would be a better husband. So she takes a lot of the blame on herself.
I'm sorry if this is not popular or what you would like to hear. I'm sorry you are going through a bad time. I wish my brother in law had gotten DF, I really do. But he will never get help because he has never really had to suffer the consequences of anything he's done.
After all that is said, welcome to the forum. I do think you can find a lot of support and good advice here. But the only one who can make things better for you is yourself. I wish you the best.
I'm not sure. I am waiting for a 'sign'.
How about this sign:
WELCOME!
And:
GO TO UNIVERSITY AND GET AN EDUCATION!
And:
Just because you'd rather look at pornography than read the latest Watchtower, it doesn't mean you're addicted to porn... IT MEANS YOU'RE NORMAL!
I hope these signs help... from a guy that's gotten out, is getting an education at university, and my interest in porn comes and goes
I will not discuss specifics of the level of deprivity of the things watched but I assure you it was not "scat" nor child pornography. There is new direction of the matter of pornography. This I am sure as it was previously unheard of, being disfellowshipped for such, until last year. (Probably something covered in Elder's School when they received their revised book for Congregation Elders.) I know a 2006 WT article discusses it--that disfellowshipping was possible disciplinary measure.
I came forward about it. I didn't want to continue this practice. I was a pioneer, on the RBC, an MS and had just about applied to BSSB in December but my conscience did not allow me to at that point. I do see it as harmful. I was asked 'how long?' I had viewed and 'how often'?. I think the fact that I had this problem before baptism, stopped before asking to be baptized, was okay for sometime afterward, but then again later and for the last 3-4 years... well, I imagine that was a major factor.
Other than that, I am considering, with a grain of salt, much of what the lot of you recommendeded. Many go back to the 'things of the past', but I did feel some teachings were right, though the hypocracy of the WTO lead me to [b]know[/b] that 'this' was not the way, but that Christ is the way, truth, and the life. I am still defining my beliefs, but I have just started. I have been reading and watching a lot of differing material. I do wish to pursue an education and move on--I have hope that I may.
A question that came up in my mind is say in the future I did decide to join, say, a non-denominational church... Would I have to write a letter of disassociation though I am already ''no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses''?
Would I have to write a letter of disassociation though I am already ''no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses''?
Nope. But it would make a nice addition to their file that you have decided to disfellowship them.
