The Difference between being a Convert and being raised a Witness

by The wanderer 31 Replies latest jw friends

  • TheSilence
    TheSilence

    :::smile::: thank you ;)

    Jackie

  • daystar
    daystar

    Do you recall the emphasis placed upon reshaping yourself, your personality, on Bible-based (read WBTS dogma based) doctrine?

    Well, imagine this being inculcated from a very young age. Our personalities were to some varying degree created by the WBTS. Contrast that with someone whose personality was developed prior to being converted.

    Imagine being an adult, raised in, and coming to the realization that you are not who you are, or would be, otherwise. In some ways, who we are inside shines through, but there are these walls built within the psyche causing all sorts of psychological challenges.

    If you were a convert, you at least have the perspective of a "before" the indoctrination began. Those of us raised in having nothing like that. We have to create ourselves anew.

    What might be interesting is to see how many "raised ins" stayed Christian vs. eventually following alternatives and compare that with converts. If they were Christian before, did they go back to the religion they came from (more or less), or did they also tend to lean towards alternatives (atheism, paganism, etc.)

  • Honesty
    Honesty
    If you were a Witness convert, how do you think your life differed to someone born and raised in the "truth."

    My ex always told me that since she was a 3rd generation witness and I was a convert she was more 'spiritually minded' than I ever could be.

    My ex also told me that she never saw any changes in converts like she saw in those 'raised in the truth.'

    My ex said that it was a 'miracle' that I was 'appointed' so soon after baptism.

    My ex said she always thought that I would leave the 'truth' since I wasn't raised in it.

    She was right.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    If you were a Witness convert, how do you think your life
    differed to someone born and raised in the "truth."

    Those raised as JW's did not seem as happy with the religion as those that joined as adults.
    We converts were celebrating holidays in our youth, we dated and had pre-marital sex, we smoked, got drunk, the normal things that young adults did.
    We allowed the mind-control cult to be a part of our lives, those raised as JW's had no choice.
    I found that many young "raised-JW" ones got in more trouble (drinking and sex). Or else they got married at age 17 or 18 (rather than sin), suffered for years as immature sheltered people thrust into adult life. Most converts already knew how to live independent of their parents, and we already had sex, so we got married when we were ready to do so.

  • choosing life
    choosing life

    I came in when I was barely an adult. The lure was paradise and never having to die, along with an answer for every question. I was very idealistic and wanted to protect my children from the wicked world. BIG MISTAKE!!!

    One difference was having no family in the congregation. So, on holidays, when all the JWs were getting together with their JW family (because they had a day off work) I was expected to stay away from my family. They would cook turkey dinners on Thanksgiving and party on the other holidays and those without family were often left out.

    I am glad I wasn't raised in it, because I got to experience the world and normal life. I am ashamed I put my children under the pressure that being different caused them. It's funny, when I decided to leave the Witnesses, I felt very similar to when I had decided to stop using drugs. I felt that it was all just a waste of time and I wanted to see the world through clear eyes.

  • sammielee24
    sammielee24

    I see the difference glaringly in the one aspect of self-awareness. A JW child is raised to place the Watchtower first always - he understands that he is of little importance thus he gives up following any dreams, he gives up getting involved, he quells any desire for knowledge, he sets no goals, he finds his hope not in anything but a kingdom hall and his faith in nobody or nothing except the Society. sammieswife.

  • kid-A
    kid-A

    Being raised a JW from birth makes you a member of a very special minority. Its impossible to describe, with a few paragraphs, the sheer misery that comes from being raised with the Watchtower corporation as your "real" parents. Perhaps a few highlights:

    1) From the moment you begin school, you live in constant humiliation. You are forced to be the class 'freak' by having to physically leave the room while the national anthem is played. You are forced to leave the room during any normal holiday activities related to the "evil, pagan holidays". Your friends, if you have any, either pity you or mock you behind your back. This continues from Kindergarten until the end of high school, by which time the psychological damage is so ingrained and intrinsic, it is difficult to form normal relationships with anyone outside the cult, which is, of course, the entire purpose of this lifelong humiliation: make the JW kid hate being in school so much, they are desperate to leave and naturally, avoid university.

    2) You live in constant envy of your "worldly" friends as they enjoy holidays, trick-or-treating, parties, school dances, the Prom, all the normal events that make adolescence tolerable.

    3) From the moment you take your first breath, you suckle at the tit of the Watchtower propaganda machine. The endless boredom and psychological torture having to endure hour after hour of mind-numbing Watchtower studies and "talks" at the Kingdumb hall or even worse....the dreaded ASSemblies which cut into your few precious weeks of summer holidays.

    4) Also from the moment of birth, you learn to fear the wrath of the big Watchtower (tm) bogey-man in the sky, Lord Jehoobie, watching every move you make, monitoring every thought you have, ready to strike you dead on a whim for questioning the wisdom of the senile old fart-knockers in Brooklyn.....

    Hmmm, 4 little points, that barely have even scratched the surface in terms of describing the experience of being raised a dub.....

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Wanderer..I was raised in the JW cult..Your told what you believe,and you better believe it,or you`ll pay the price..Kid-A echoes the experiences of thousands of DubKids..Get DubKids together and you`ll hear the same storys practically word for word..Life as a DubKid is Hell!!..JW parents don`t realize the trama they put us through.They tell us we have wonderfull lives.Any problems it causes us dosen`t exist,the WBT$ says so.....Leaving Hell is alot harder for DubKids.You don`t know life outside the cult..Everbody you know will turn on you.You better be ready to re-write your world all by yourself,because theres nobody there to help you..If your strong enough you can do it..If not,you can always go back to Hell...OUTLAW

  • restrangled
    restrangled
    Wanderer..I was raised in the JW cult..Your told what you believe,and you better believe it,or you`ll pay the price..Kid-A echoes the experiences of thousands of DubKids..Get DubKids together and you`ll hear the same storys practically word for word..Life as a DubKid is Hell!!..JW parents don`t realize the trama they put us through.They tell us we have wonderfull lives.Any problems it causes us dosen`t exist,the WBT$ says so.....Leaving Hell is alot harder for DubKids.You don`t know life outside the cult..Everbody you know will turn on you.You better be ready to re-write your world all by yourself,because theres nobody there to help you..If your strong enough you can do it..If not,you can always go back to Hell...OUTLAW

    DITTO! The only thing I will add is that if your family stayed in, the Hell doesn't stop. Everytime you see relatives (if you are allowed) there is constant nagging about how you have gone wrong, how could you leave Jeh., why don't you just come to one meeting, have a bible study, what about your own kids, the end is almost here, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH ad nauseam. r.

  • Mulan
    Mulan

    I was raised in it, and I saw some differences.

    Those who were converts brought some of their "churchy" ideas with them..............and some of the lingo. They would always say things like "if Jehovah wills". That sounded so odd to me. Our family never said things like that. Our large extended family were all JW's (almost all) so we never dealt with any negative family things for being JW's.

    We were more laid back about our faith than the new ones. (maybe it was the times too.............converts after about 1970 dealt with a stricter organization than I grew up in) Maybe because it was all we knew, it was just our life. Because I was in school in the 50's and early 60's, I had no problems being a JW, at school. There simply were not the restrictions on school kids that came later. For holiday things, I would go to the library, which I loved to do, or stay home.

    Can't think of any others...........just got up.

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