My publisher is now taking orders for Father's Touch (340 pages), my memoir of surviving sexual, psychological and religious abuse.
Here is the book store link: http://www.pdbookstore.com (then look for Healing/Recovery link on the left list of topics)
I thought I'd post one last excerpt from my book... Thanks for your interest,
Donald D'Haene
Chapter Two
One of my childhoods was happy.
My first memories flicker like old home movies with sound: inside our house, a sofa with three torn cushions and one broken leg faces an aging television with rabbit ears on top. The TV is turned to an afternoon soap opera. Pages from picture books fill their wooden frames, hanging unevenly on walls of discolored paper. Everything is brown and broken but clean. Outside, the family dog is barking at black birds. My older brother, Ronny, and my baby sister, Marina, are playing in a pile of leaves nearby.
I never played my siblings games, but I didnt mind watching them or refereeing their fights.
I was never lonely.
This is his room. Bored with the rays of light, I notice a broken doll on the floor. My attention is diverted for the time being. The dolls legs are separated from her hips so I try to fit the doll together so she can walk.
Mama, always adorned with her ten-year-old, gold-colored earrings and a plain white apron, was usually in the kitchen citing biblical verses. "The Lord is my shepherd....And you will know de trut, and de trut will set you free....God is love." A Bible, apron, and earrings. These were the indelible symbols that marked Mothers simple life. Her daily routine involved cooking, cleaning, and studying scriptureeverything she did revolved around her devotion to her children and her faith in God. Although the Lord was very important in her life, Mama constantly reminded us that her children meant everything to her.
Papa, on the other hand, was a remote figure. He never interacted with us. His attention was always directed elsewhere: a book or magazine, a letter he was writing, or a visitor to be engaged in philosophical discussion. Languages and matters of faith especially intrigued himanything that challenged him intellectually. We children did not fall into those categories. Once in a while he would break from reading to chase us and rub his unshaven whiskers on our cheeks. We hated that. It hurt our skin. He did it to Mama and even she seemed to only tolerate it.
Papa worked a rotation of three different shifts at a factory, so he usually slept during the day. Mama would caution: Play quietly, cause you do not want to get your Papa angry. He needs his sleep.
When Ronny and Marina made noise, they were disciplined. I wanted to be a good boy. I didnt want to get spanked or cause any trouble. I did what Mama and Papa told me to do.
Papa kept an album of his younger days in the top drawer of his dresser. I found my fathers youth fascinating. I felt disappointed there were no pictures of mother as a young girl, but Id study the photos of my parents courtship for hours upon hours. I could see my mothers likeness in these old black and white photos, but my father seemed a completely different person. Hed become so much larger, with broad shoulders and large hands. And his hair had been blond but now it had grown dark. I wondered why had it changed?
Family life revolved around worshipping God as members of Jehovahs Witnesses, a religious sect renowned as much for its inflexible moral standards as for its proselytizing and controversial doctrines. Thrice weekly attendance was required at its house of worship, the Kingdom Hall, by every member of my family.
One of my earliest memories was of Mama explaining her faith by the use of picture books.
See dese sheep here wit de shepherd? Dere are only a few people in de whole world dat know de trut, Donald. Most of de people worship Satan but dey dont know dey do. Dey are de goats! De shepherd, Jesus, separates de sheep from de goats. Do you understand?
I think so.
Do you know how fortunate you are dat you know de true God?
Oh yes, Mama.
Now you must do what God wants you to do. He helps his people, especially de Elders at de hall, to know what he expects from dem. Dey tell us what were supposed to do wit de help from de Bible. Dat is why you must listen to your vader and moeder. We know de trut.
Okay, Mama.
My mother had told me the story of her getting The Truth, her truth, so often I knew it by heart. It became Mothers version of a bedtime story. Im sure it was her way of convincing me we had the one true religion. Her early instruction proved successful......
Copyright, Donald D'Haene 2002
Edited by - morrisamb on 10 June 2002 5:39:32
Edited by - morrisamb on 10 June 2002 5:43:18