Art Vandelay
JoinedI was raised in it, 4th generation Witness. Parents split at a young age and my father died a few years later, so of course I was pretty jacked up from that. Turned to the usual vices to deal with the emotional trauma, and went thru years of committee meetings, each one being handled worse than the previous one. Finally df'd at 20 and kicked out. Stayed away for a couple of years before I came back, I still thought it was *the truth* but I was starting to have my doubts. Started doing more and more research and things just didn't add up. I finally came to the conclusion that it was all crap and not just a few bad elders here and there. I couldn't just walk away though because of how close I was to my younger brothers, so I started drinking, going to meetings drunk for over a year. I ended up forcing their hands by getting into a sexual relationship with a prominent sisters daughter. I told my bookstudy conductor that I was leaving town and had no intention of meeting with the elders, that they should just go ahead and disfellowship me without me there. Luckily, he felt pity for me and told me to just make the best of things in the new city and that he would make sure I wasn't df'd. Maybe there's hope for him yet! My family are still hardcore dubs though. So our relationship is very strained and I get the typical emails about coming back, how I -know what's right- and know that -the world has nothing to offer-. Sure it hurts, I'm missing out on watching my little brothers grow up, and I know I'm causing my family intense heartache... but it's THEIR love that's conditional, not mine. It's amazing to wake up in the morning and be happy with who you are, to not have the need or desire to self-medicate. I'm even in college now, something I never would have imagined.