Rodney
JoinedI was never abused as a child. Well not physically anyway. My parents always provided food, discipline and recreation. When I was an infant, my mom became a Jehovahs Witness. My dad joined when I was in my teens. I knew from a very early age that I could not adhere to their strict beliefs. That feeling of being a wicked person combined with the teaching that Armageddon could come at any moment to destroy all the wicked, didnt make for a happy childhood. Needless to say I didnt have many long term goals, and my decision making and values were slightly skewed. My going astray eventually led me to be labeled as unwise to associate with. Since I came to an understanding of Jehovahs Witnesses practices, and then later rejected them, I am to be shunned by all Jehovahs Witnesses, including my parents. I disbanded my humble business and left home. My new job afforded me the opportunity to travel all over the country. I still believed Jehovahs Witnesses to be true, having been raised within from infancy. Still some things just didnt seem to make sense. This time in my life is best described as Neo waking up from the Matrix. I was always told that the world had a veil pulled over its eyes that did not allow them to see things clearly, when in fact it was me who had been wearing the veil, and I had been trying to see through it my whole life. Finally now I could see the world for what it really is, and also look back and see where I was coming from. It has been over ten years. I am still learning about people and about myself. I question everything. If it doesnt make sense I want no part of it. My friends say I think too much. They are probably right! I spent too much time having someone do my thinking for me. I spent too much time always feeling wrong. Now is my time! I must explore. Recently I confronted my parents. I know now they will never be free. They need it to survive. They need to know that they have the ultimate source of truth. They will never acknowledge any doubt, even at the cost of their son. I am still working on my new family now, in the form of all the friends I can find. I have met so many people. Some I care for and some not so much, but I guess thats what a family is. Often I can tell I am misunderstood. I hope that everyone will understand it is my lack of familiarity with life. I am so happy now. Still, I must question authority and push the boundaries at all times. What if I am still trapped in another Matrix? How many levels are there? I guess that is my message in life. Are you trapped in your own Matrix? Maybe even one of your own manufacture? Are your beliefs and values your own, or what you have been told by well meaning, however misguided individuals? Do some things make sense while others do not? Do you question the source of information or just follow? The truth is out there. Find it for yourself.