mad max

mad max

Joined

Started studying when I was about 16 years old along with my whole family. Dad, Mom, big sister, myself and my smaller sister. Got babtized in 1982 thereafter my whole family except my Dad who died. Then thereafter started my journey with the JW. The whole family on the whole was considered "strong", my mom pioneered 90 hours, I on a regular basis 60 hours. Flowed in the cong. but noticed that I never got invited out, being single,(they only asked me to babysit for them) remember when this couple came up to me and asked what I was doing that Friday night, there I am thinking that they are going to invite me over, Oh no, just wanted me to babysit, I went outside, sat on the pavement and cried and cried) NO LOVE. It was me all the time working with a sister or brother who they did not want to work with. CLICKS in the cong. GOSSIP. But just stayed and stayed. Went all the time to meetings, field service (how I now loath these words) During this time did go out, drank, quite a lot with the JW. But nothing was said. Then I think one day I just up and went, went into the "world", did everything I wanted etc. Mom and big sister, spoke to me still under, not much but still would speak to me, hoping I would come back. Stayed out for about 8 years, NOT ONE PHONE CALL OR VISIT from ANYONE, and I was considered "strong" Knew hundreds or brothers and sisters, but not one call. I was "loved" by them all (now I can see it was only an outward show). Vomit. Just could not. This year 2005 end Jan went to a church, got born again and I really mean it. It was then that I came on this net and started to check out about the society and what I found out opened my eyes. I was shocked!!! I went to my big sister and mom and told them, but only a little bit just a little. My goodness the next min. get a call from this one elder that I knew very well, wanted to come around to my place and see if I have any problem!!!!! After 8 years, can you believe it!! and told him that as well. Told him what I have read about the society. It was then that after another call he wanted me to come to the KH for a commitee case, said I would decline. They went ahead to DF me. Now members of my family will not speak to me at all. Though I was born again, I sometimes still think about this whole God thing. Some times I just don't know.