Born and raised. Left after my son was molested and the elders were going to take action against me for opening the back door. Always thought that if I worked hard enough Jehovah would see that I was viable for his kingdom. When things started to happen I could only see my life flashing in front of my eyes because I didn't know anything else in this life, except the organization and the wonderful friends I made through my life were only JWS. I never thought I would be where I am today. After dad died November 5,1998 his last words on the phone as I was in NY trying to get down to NC to see him were "Find your Happiness no matter where it leads you." I never made it down to his place as the rain was so bad and to many accidents. He died four days later. My dad was an elder who stepped down after the talks we had about things that I had done. He was not going to turn me in to the elders and told me when I was ready and felt heartfelt repentance I should go talk to the elders here. I looked at him and asked him, "How would I feel repentance for something so wonderful?" He smiled, shook his head and the next I knew he had stepped down from his eldership. IN my book my dad will always be my hero no matter if in flesh or spirit. I am not dsf and dont really care if I were. The elders stopped by in March to request I come back to the hall. I told them that I do study the bible and I don't agree with their doctrines. That I am on a different path and I don't need anyone coming to my door to bother with me. I knew these two elders and I actually felt bad for letting them stand in the pouring rain on my icy deck. Life is to live and experience. Experiences should never be taken away by an organization. Also what I found through studying that they use channeling to reach the new light they record for all to see then deny the use of channeling for their peon followers. Meditation should never be done as it gives room for the demons. Jesus meditated but they tell us it is wrong. How many times will the light change before my mother figures it all out? The best healing books I have read were Franz's and Conversations with God books 1,2. Nothing is good or bad it just is. It is what you choose to experience in this life that matters, not others judgements on what you should and should not do.