We used to have the bookstudy held in our home... WHAT A PRIVELEGE... and then of course we had a problem with the only brother turning up for the study being the brother taking the group for a few months. So as a sister I was given the incredible privelege of the reading assignment. Looking back it must have been incredibly amusing listening to me read cos I have a slight lisp which really becomes pronounced when I have to read out loud etc!
misspeaches
JoinedPosts by misspeaches
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126
What Was Your Greatest "Privilege" In The Organization?
by minimus inwas it being able to join the theocratic ministry school?
being a regular pioneer?
"handling microphones"?
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9
How Can I Reassure Him?
by misspeaches ini have a friend who has been raised a jdub all his life.
he is what you would classify as 'weak' and leading a double life.
in fact he has admitted to me that he is gay and had some gay encounters.
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misspeaches
Its so frustrating I agree... The circular reasoning of the WT is so destructive. I used to not think a bad thing about them but stepping back and examining the whole picture has been very disappointing. However now I am FREE!! And I want my friend to be free as well... Leological I think that your approach may be good. I have always been supportive of his sexuality since he told me. After all that's who he is and its hardly his fault. If I start making him realise he is always unclean in his religons eyes it may make him be more ready to think and look at things. I will take a look at the links you provided and see if I can find some way to reason with him. Yes i have told him that there are active JW's and non JW's posting here as well. But he is scared. As he has been trained to be. My poor friend... :o(
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How Can I Reassure Him?
by misspeaches ini have a friend who has been raised a jdub all his life.
he is what you would classify as 'weak' and leading a double life.
in fact he has admitted to me that he is gay and had some gay encounters.
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misspeaches
I've told him that I am reading this board and have posted a couple of times to try and make him interested. But my god did he freak out. He told me that everyone on this site is an apostate. I told him that wasn't true and that they are all ex JW's. And he then goes to me yes - that means they are apostates. At which stage I told him to pull his head in and reminded him I am an ex JW and asked if I was an apostate. So that changed his thinking a bit but still he is not ready to look at anything like JWD. dammit.
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9
How Can I Reassure Him?
by misspeaches ini have a friend who has been raised a jdub all his life.
he is what you would classify as 'weak' and leading a double life.
in fact he has admitted to me that he is gay and had some gay encounters.
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misspeaches
I have a friend who has been raised a JDub all his life. He is what you would classify as 'weak' and leading a double life. In fact he has admitted to me that he is gay and had some gay encounters. Despite the fact that he knows I no longer call my self a JW or believe what they do we still remain excellent friends. He would probably go to the Kingdom Hall 3 times a year including the memorial. I give you this background so you can see that he is not all really that gung-ho about the troof. Despite this he has that fear of Armaggedon. and constantly looks for the signs of the end. I have tried to talk to him gently about how the JW's beliefs are not the truth but he doesn't want to hear it. This morning I get a phone call from him because of the Earthquake just above Australia yesterday that measured 8.? on the richter scale. Naturally his immediate conclusion is this is just yet another sign of the end and is freaking out about being killed at Armaggedon. He is so highly intelligent and I wish I knew what I could say to reassure him but I am stumped! What do I do???
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A personal account
by cheeseman ini'm new to the forum.
glad i found this place, it seems i've finally found somewhere i feel comfortable.
i'm writing this to get some stuff out of my system.
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misspeaches
Hi Cheeseman I am so sorry to read your account. It sounds like you have encountered a really rough time. I recommend to keep on posting at this board. I personally have found the people here to be great. Just getting your thoughts together and written down can be very therapuetic. And finding others who have been through similar experiences helps you deal with the fact that the problem doesn't lie with you in as much as that it lies with the organisation. Don't be afraid to express your feelings. You're making steps in the right direction!!! Hang in there matey!!!
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Remembering growing up as a JDub hurts...
by misspeaches inyou know i've been fading for 18 months now.
i come from a smallish city of about half a dozen congregations so just about everyone knows everyone so its not such an easy thing to do.
growing up as a jdub was so hard and awful.
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misspeaches
Hi Soledad. Reading this forum certainly helps to realise you are not alone in your experiences and subsequent feelings. I'm sorry to hear that you had a bad day yesterday. I hope that this is temporary and you will be bouncing back soon. Thanks for your welcome!
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Remembering growing up as a JDub hurts...
by misspeaches inyou know i've been fading for 18 months now.
i come from a smallish city of about half a dozen congregations so just about everyone knows everyone so its not such an easy thing to do.
growing up as a jdub was so hard and awful.
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misspeaches
Thanx. Its all a learning experience. I feel like I am a teenager just finding out who life really operates. I am slowly but surely building a network of genuine friends. And they know my background which I think is important so they understand me better.
Under 74 - Thankyou. Reading posts from other members with similar experiences can be very therapeutic
Black Sheep - Observation of how people operate in the real world certainly helps. Its hard not to be envious of your neighbours leading such functional lives at times!!
Hubert - Thanks for your support. I am very lucky to have such a great guy in my life. It?s certainly started me off in the right direction towards normality. Its also helped me develop some self esteem which I don't think I had before knowing that I'm good enough for someone. He is slowly but surely also training me to not let people treat me like a doormat. I hope that all is okay with your daughter and that the door to communication between the two of you always stays open.
Nancy Drake - You understand too. You leave the organisation and you have that underlying fear that they were always right and that everyone outside of the dubs is sad and lonely. What a lie that turned out to be. I'm so sorry to hear about your parents. I wish I had the confidence to DA myself but I know I would lose my mother and brother in the process. However you have a beautiful son. If I had a child I would want to give them everything that I had been denied growing up. Feeling sorry for myself has happening on a less frequent basis.
DragonLady - Thanx for the invite. I will make sure I drop into Chat.
JustTickledPink - The first step was the hardest of all. Every sequential step I will take now will be so much easier knowing that I have others in the same position as myself.
Taylor S - I feel for you growing up. I too was the bookish kid. I had trouble making friends our family being the only JW's in the school and found sanctuary in the school library. Clothes were hand me downs. Sports was certainly not encouraged so I sucked at that. Plus I developed that piggish snobbish "I'm right your all wrong" dub attitude as well. None of this gained me any friends. Taylor I hope that you continue to find the confidence to connect with people. You have reached out to me and frankly I think that shows a beautiful aspect of your personality. Thank you.
Mamacat - Its strange when you get told over and over not to be cliquish just how cliquish the organisation is. People can be extremely insensitive. Fancy showing you a scrapbook of events you were not included in...
Sobeit - Being well read is something I can say I am. I found my only solace in books. I love reading and its my favourite pastime for relaxing or escaping. Its a learning experience to find that there is nothing sinful about independent thinking. Not at all preaching, your thoughts and input is very much appreciated.
Thanks everyone. In a moment of despair I spilled my guts on the www. But you have all been very understanding and welcoming.
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13
Remembering growing up as a JDub hurts...
by misspeaches inyou know i've been fading for 18 months now.
i come from a smallish city of about half a dozen congregations so just about everyone knows everyone so its not such an easy thing to do.
growing up as a jdub was so hard and awful.
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misspeaches
You know I've been fading for 18 months now. I come from a smallish city of about half a dozen congregations so just about everyone knows everyone so its not such an easy thing to do. Growing up as a JDub was so hard and awful. When I think of how socially stunted it made me it still upsets me. I began to stop being an active member of the congregation because I was tired of feeling like an outsider never part of the in crowd. I never seemed to manage to interact with people successfully. It didn't make it any easier that mum had an unbelieving husband and was trying to bring myself sister and brother along to meetings and raise as good Jdubs. Being the environment that it is with social standings etc we were never accepted. Not invited to parties and gatherings. Always being encouraged by mum to invite people to our place and eventually they would reciprocate. Theres so many little stories that I could compile altogether and it is such an unjust unloving organisation. I apologise for seeming all over the place but right now I feel so depressed. I stopped attending meetings etc when I was 27 and started rebelling in a big way. I wanted to experience everything that had ever been denied me. I wanted to have friends. I wanted to know what it was like to have a boy hold you hand... It was gradual but now I have some very good very close non conditional friends. I have a boyfriend. Who I love and adore. Who cries with me when sometimes I can't handle the memories of being a JW. Naturally someone has run to the elders about seeing me so they decide that its time for a sheperading call. It was a traumatising conversation but I stood firm and told them that wouldn't be necessary. I know I sound so depressed, but really I am not a depressive person naturally. Sometimes its just that the whole experience gets to overwhelming. In fact since washing my hands clean of them all I am the happiest I have been my whole life. And I am trying to get over all my social oddities. Only 6 months ago my boss hauled me into the office to tell me I have no idea how to deal with people. She told me I needed professional help to see how normal people interact. I tend to be very reactionary, a self defence mechnaism I developed over the years. A few weeks ago she apologised for that. She told me she didn't realise my background as a JW and said it wasn't my fault. I'm feeling sad tonight. And I'm sorry for unloading. I hope you all have a lovely weekend.
Cheers - Miss Peaches -
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Jehovah's Witnesses GET CRAZY!!
by GetBusyLiving indo you guys know any very obviously crazy jw's?
i've noticed that they have been "flocking" to the org.
over the past few years especially.
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misspeaches
I have a few notable mentions from congs I have been to 1) We had a lady who was mentally disabled coming along to meetings for years. She loved going witnessing but naturally being loving jw's *sic* no one would want to pick her up or work with her. She used to trap householders at the doors for hours talking rot. she had an extremeley noticable limp. Eventually she got approved to go on the TMS. Her talks were always a riot. even when she was sitting up there in her tracksuit! She also loved kids and would chase them around the hall before and after the meeting. Because of her limp it would make an awful racket has she ka-thumped around the hall. It took about 1/2 an hour to baptise her when the day came because she was afraid of the water. I feel bad for her but in a boring meeting she sure was interesting. 2) We had a single pioneer sister in her 70's in another cong who thought she was gorgeous. About a size 18 she was always going on about her young girls figure to anyone who would listen. She used to threaten the single pioneer brothers that she would invite them around to her flat and open the door in her bra and knickers. She lived across the road from me and my flatmate and would watch for when we got home. she would come over walk in the front door sit in the loungeroom and dictate to us what she wanted to watch on tv. one time i saw her coming so i ran out the back door jumped over the back fence and left my flatmate to contend with her. 3) In another congregation there was another poor lady who was mentally disabled in her early 30's. She used to come along with her mum. When the brothers on microphone duty walked past her she used to proposition them and ask them to **** her. She used to sit there and swear under her breath all meeting long. Then she went around the cong claiming that one of the young teenage girls was actually her daughter and claimed she had had an affair with one of the elders years ago. She had lived in a special home with other people with similiar illnesses and picked up all sorts of nasty habits and language while there. I feel sorry for these poor people but they sure made the otherwise boring meetings that little bit more interesting.
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As a single woman she became more independant
by purplesofa inexerpt from 2/1/05 wt is the truth bearing fruit in those you teach?.
consider how another christian was able to help her bible student.
the student was attending meetings and sharing in the ministry and had already expressed a desire to get baptised.
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misspeaches
I hate the jw definition of independence. As a single independent woman (ie lived on my own, nice car, good job) I constantly recieved unwelcome spiritual encouragement from other dubs. despite going to all the meetings and regular harrassing ministry work I still had sisters in the congregation who felt the need to offer me bible studies. They were worried about me?? It really OD's me.