Shunning

by MsMcDucket 6 Replies latest jw friends

  • MsMcDucket
    MsMcDucket

    Hello, I've introduced myself in a previous post in another forum, so I'm hoping not to appear to be rude. Right now, I'm being shunned by my twin daughters, whom I love to death. I'm trying to keep busy to keep from losing my mind. They are only 18 years old. They both just started college this year. I kicked them out because they were getting so pompous and disrespectful towards me and my husband. Of course, the "brothers" jumped on this! They chose this time to tell them not to talk to me. Before I kicked them out, I made sure that they would have the things that they needed. They have a car, a place to stay, and they get money from their father's VA benefits. I, also, made sure that they each had cell phones, so that they could call me anytime that they needed to. The only call that I've gotten is one where my daughter told me that "she wasn't supposed to be talking to me anymore". I wanted them to learn about the world and what it takes to be adults, not to be overtaken by the JW organization. I could take it if I knew that they are mad at me because of kicking them out, but not because I'm not a JW. Does this make sense to anyone?

    I don't want them to try to discipline me! WTF, excuse my French! I don't want to be a JW, and I don't want to be forced to be a JW. The organization couldn't get to me when I left by shunning me because they didn't have that kind of hold on me...but my kids...they know that I love them!

    I just want to know that the twins are safe and doing this on their own. I may have to go ahead and go crazy on them and start kicking some doors down to find out what those children are up to.

    It's just been about nine days since they moved out, but I'm going batty already!

  • Been there
    Been there

    Do you have reason to believe they are shunning you for that reason?

    It is always hard when they leave the nest and you can't keep track of them any more. They have each other so they aren't as needy as alot of kids that may need to check in more often to keep the connection to home, home is with them alittle more. They are probably testing out being "grown ups" right now. At that age and freedom, the WT shouldn't have too big a hold on them. Not for long anyway. I think they will be fine. In Nine days they haven't even got their clothes in the closet yet.

    Enjoy the peace and quiet for now.

    Welcome to the board!

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Yup What beenthere said

    They are in one of the best places to get their minds working again. Just hang on for the ride and hope it will be a short one

  • MsMcDucket
    MsMcDucket

    One twin has called and said that "they aren't supposed to be talking to me anymore". I haven't heard a peep from the other. So, yes, they are shunning me. I guess that I'll live through it. I still have my two other daughters and a grandson to keep me busy.

  • AlmostAtheist
    AlmostAtheist

    I'm really sorry to hear this, MsM. Hang in there. Keep in mind that they can still talk to you about "necessary family business", so if you're paying the cell phone bill, or tuition, or any other items you can call "necessary", then you can call them about that. So long as it doesn't seem you're abusing that, it's at least a way to hear their voice from time to time.

    Hang in there. :-(

    Dave

  • MsMcDucket
    MsMcDucket

    I guess that I'll get over it. Right now, it's just a new open wound. I know now that a "true" religion wouldn't separate families, and make children dishonor their parents. It's strange how people minds can be trained to do things that they wouldn't normally do. My mother use to tell me to not talk to the Witnessess, and I had to open the door. I should have listened to my mother. I bet my mom is having a good laugh, now! Because I did the very same thing that my kids are doing. What comes around goes around! Such is life. If I happened to see them on the street or wherever, I'm going to yell out a great big "HELLO!"; and if I'm close enough, I'm going to grab them and hug them!

  • Been there
    Been there

    You can always stop paying the cell phone bill and see how long it takes them not to talk to you.

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