Leaving it behind for good

by joelbear 1 Replies latest jw friends

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  joelbear

  its interesting how as i have been going through a deep reexamination of my life, how much i was still attached to my past. as you can see from my posts i am in an "exercise" program, exercising by keeping busy in the things that I have always loved. i am out of the rut and a happier person for it.

  for me, rehashing material that I have decided was bogus long ago is playing a less and less important part in my recovery. i think i have reached a new step out of the borgmire.

  i met another gay jw on a bear site and he came over for dinner last night. it was interesting to see where the two of us were on our paths. he was a very sweet guy and I think we will become close friends. that will be nice.

  something has shifted in my brain. all i can think of is the new art projects i want to do and the places i want to go see and the people i want to make as friends and so on ........

  it takes a lot of effort to make the shift and one thing i am finding out is that you really have to make the shift 100%, if you cling on to old ways of thinking, they win, you have to replace them totally with a new way of thinking, a true rewashing and cleansing of the soul.
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  Billygoat

  it takes a lot of effort to make the shift and one thing i am finding out is that you really have to make the shift 100%, if you cling on to old ways of thinking, they win, you have to replace them totally with a new way of thinking, a true rewashing and cleansing of the soul.

  This is so true Joel. I realized awhile back when I hit my "rut", that I have to follow a recipe to the letter to get out of it. It's really simple when you look at it in writing. It's worked for me:

  1. Wake up early.
  2. Pray out loud or silently about what's making your heart heavy. Make the concious effort to "wallow" in it for 5 minutes and no more.
  3. Take a brisk walk or run, no matter the weather.
  4. Take shower and get "dolled" up. Not just clean, but get dressed like I'm really trying to look Good for my hubby. (Looking cute really makes me feel good!)
  5. Go about the rest of the day.
  6. Repeat for at least 5 days.

  Sometimes it takes three days for the "benefit" to kick in, but it's MUCH, MUCH easier for me to pull myself out of pits of depression. I have a mantra I learned from Al-Anon many years ago: Fake it 'til you make it. It works because it forces me into action when my depression would allow me to stay under the covers for weeks.