I've only posted here a couple of times, but had a tremendous wave of guilt after I did so. Not as far as the "truth" was concerned, but to my husband. He obviously doesn't know I'm doing this and I almost felt like I was cheating on him or something - ugh!! Anyone else ever feel like this and if so, how did/do you deal with it??
Feeling Guilty...
by hopetofade 5 Replies latest jw friends
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jgnat
Have you seen the commercial where the husband wanders on to a porn site, then hears his wife coming down the stairs? He frantically tries to shut down the site - no luck - and finally smashes the monitor down on the keyboard. The commercial goes on to recommend getting a laptop. Hilarious!
I am a non-JW, active poster, with an active JW husband. How do I deal with it? I don't keep any secrets. I regularly talk about stuff I find here, the more inoffensive the better. He especially appreciates the advance warning of upcoming releases, etc.
Thank you fluff threads!
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kls
I felt that way at first but now i feel he has his jws and have my Apostate friends and i know he does things with them behind my back and i am sure he has no guilt so why should i . Give it time and you are not cheating on him but learning and making friends with others like yourself and remember he goes to his meeting to get stronger in the lies of the wt and you are here getting stronger learning the lies of the wt and how to cope and deal with the mind of a jw .
If you feel you are cheating then he is also cheating
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diamondblue1974
KLS thats a great way of looking at it....hadnt thought of it like that; you mustve been a well trained monkey!
sometimes its difficult for those whose partners still 'in' the Borg...its is even more difficult sometimes for partners of those who have never experienced JWism and wonder what the hell is going on when you are posting and cant shut up about it.
Some partners might view posting here as a threat, for those partners on the outside and no experience of JWs be honest with them, Ive found it helps...if they feel involved they are hardly likely to let their imaginations run riot are they?
DB74
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Sith
I am an alcoholic. I am also a recovering alcoholic. I've been going to AA for over 2 years now.
Non-alcoholics don't have any idea what we suffer through. Our addiction harms everyone around us, especially family and friends...those that love us.
Alcoholics will never change unless they want to. Therefore, people that love alcoholics have two choices. 1)Leave them to self-destruct on their own, protecting themselves in the process, or 2)sticking with them, empowering themselves in the process, and calling the alkie on his shit. There is a self-help program for people who love an alcoholic and choose the latter. It's called AlAnon.
I think that a person who loves a JW is in much the same situation. You can't help your JW mate. Only he/she can. Maybe someday they will, maybe they never will. There is nothing to do for him/her. The only thing you can do is empower and educate yourself. That's not cheating on your spouse. That's making yourself better so if they chose to better themselves, you are there for them.
That's how you should view this board.
Robbie -
kls
Very good Robbie ,help yourself first before you can help others