Having gone through the trauma of puberty and emerging a man I thought that my days of surprise hair sprouting were behind me. Unfortunately I was wrong. My nose for instants. I understand the need for some filtering and the tufty growth up each nostril has served me well for many a year. It appears now that as I progress in years I will become more susceptible to dust partials as each nostril has taken it upon itself to race for the lip line. Wise planning on my part has place a moustache barrier in the way that offers some camouflage but a biweekly plucking is still needed. I'll progress now to the external surface of the nose. I have always looked upon my nose with great fondness, neither too big or too small, straight and well proportioned it is is free of pockmarks or the ravages of the sauce. It has served me well up until now but my facial friend now turns on me and presents the occasional tough black hair, for what purpose I can begin to imagine. To balance any nasal protrusions my beard has taken it upon itself to head south and is currently holding at three quarters of an inch from my eye lids. I shall be practising my fire eating, tightrope walking and juggling in preparation for my time with the carnival.
All the above I can live with and accept, there is one thing however that I am ashamed of and of course is the one thing I have the least power to control. Ear hair. It grows daily. It serves no purpose. It either clumps together on that triangular bit of cartilage or sneakily sprouts a full length head hair out the side that grows happily whilst blending with its more conventional brethren. It is naturally in the most inconvenient place to tend being a two mirror job and as I live in a house full of females the chance of a portable mirror staying in the same place from one day to the next aren't worth thinking about.
Some men fear going bald but not I. I long for the day when I can put down my tweezers but in reality realise that my unsightly hair will soon be in the majority. Oh well maybe I'll just have to embrace the ear hair comb-over.