Update to Shawn's Story

by Shawn 7 Replies latest jw experiences

  • Shawn
    Shawn

    It has been a while since I last updated everyone. I am doing so now because I think people going through what I am need to know that there is hope and although sometimes it may seem impossible, it isn't.

    I am going to assume that anyone reading this post is familiar with my story. If you are not than I recommend checking about a month and a half back on this board. It seems like I was everywhere then.

    My friend and I are still friends. We went a couple of weeks where we didn't talk much at all. We went days without talking. Doesn't seem like much but for nearly a year we had not gone more than 12 hours without talking or a day with out seeing eachother. Things are much better now. I don't see her as much as I would like or for as long as I would like but we do see eachother. We hang out and try to do stuff. She is of course even more worried now than before about being seen with me by JWs. We manage though. Even if we have to go out of town for a few hours.

    She hasn't been DF'd yet. I am not sure when the JC is. She still doesn't really talk to me about it. I know it is coming up though. That will be the true test of our friendship vs her dedication to the Borg. Through all that has happened I am hopeful that we will endure.

    Her life the past month has been very rough. She struggles daily with choices she has made and where she is in life. She feels trapped and thinks it is her only option. I still pray daily that the seeds planted in her grow and I know that others are keeping her in their prayers too.

    It is a hard thing to hear but it is too true, this is not a quick process. For many reasons this takes a long time. It has been 2 months for me and I know there is more to go. I have grown more than I ever thought possible and my Faith has grown too. God will make what is ment to happen happen in His time. No other's. Trust in him and know that as long as what you want is pure and true it is what he wants too. If what you want is not pure and true then perhaps you need to move on.

    Love JWs. They deserve it. Read all you can about what they think and why they think what they do. Being educated is the one thing that you can use against the Borg. It is the one thing they cannot deny a non-JW. Find a JW, befriend them and witness to them. Truley witness to them and do it for no other reason than to spread the love of God around. JWs crave God, only they are being lied to about where he is.

    God Bless you all and my eternal thanks to those who know who they are. It is good to be back. I only hope and pray that by the time I move on God's time will have come.

  • NewLight2
    NewLight2

    Welcome back, Shawn!

    I'm a bit confused by your latest update. Why is your friend going to be df'ed? I thought that she was on her way "back in" again. What has happened that you feel she may be df'ed??

    NewLight2

  • Shawn
    Shawn

    She is going to be DF'd because people know that we had a relationship. She has attended holiday parties with me and her family. She has done a whole bunch of things that JWs cannot do. She is the one who told me she will be DF'd.

    In a way I wish she wouldn't get DF'd because I know it is a horible thing but in a way I am glad she will because it will show how cruel and unChristian the Borg is.

  • NewLight2
    NewLight2

    You're right, the borg is cruel. But take heart, this event just may bring her to her senses about how unfair the JW religion is. It is the shunning that is the cruel part, as no JW will be speaking to her after she is df'ed. She will no doubt turn to your friendship after the shunning starts.

    NewLight2

  • TheListener
    TheListener

    Shawn,

    I have followed your story with interest. Thank you for the update.

    I'm sorry your friend is going through this rough time. Being there for her is one of the best and nicest things you can do. She may not fully realize how much she needs you but she'll be grateful one day. Imagine the conflicting emotions she is having. One on hand the truth with all its future promises and pleasing God and on the other hand the cruel way they treat erring ones and the support that you a non-witness shows even in a time of trouble. Her experiences in life go against what the congregation would have her believe. "Worldly" ones aren't all bad and they can offer non-condemnatory support that the congregation can't.

    Good luck to both of you.

  • kj
    kj

    Thanks for the update, Shawn. You're a good friend, I hope your story will have a happy ending.

    kj

  • Check_Your_Premises
    Check_Your_Premises

    Wow Shawn, I am impressed.

    So she is getting DF'd. I know it is going to be painful for her, but it is a way out.

    It is ultimately, therefore, a good thing.

    It sounds like you are really doing a good job with this. I know I was pretty hard on you, but it was more of a drill-instructor-trying-to-look-out-for-you kind of thing.

    Let me put it this way.

    I wish I could say my wife was getting disfellowshipped soon! I am jealous!

    Now the trick is keeping her out. She may be much more open to jw criticism now. Did you get Hassan's book?

    CYP

  • Swan
    Swan

    Good luck to you both Shawn! It will be very difficult for her, but I'm sure you will find a way to support her emotionally through this. You can always show her this site if she needs to talk to others who have gone through this.

    Tammy

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