I just realized

by heatherg 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • heatherg
    heatherg

    I never properly introduced myself. I just hopped on and started posting!
    My story reads pretty much the same as most of yours. Dad was a hypocritical elder that phsycially, mentally, and emotionally abused us kids and my mother.
    As the oldest I had to set the example and be the good little JW, reg pioneer, and all that crap. Wasn't a good girl really though, realized I had to get away from the borg and my family if I was to survive. Tried many a time to end my own life but decided that I wasn't going to let them win. I left at age 19 getting df'd for fornication. At least that's the reason I gave them, wasn't true, but didn't care. Figured I'd leave with a bang. Had a few rough yrs at first. As a JW and especially as a girl, you're not raised or prepared for the big world. As nothing was expected of me but to marry, produce kids, and pioneer. I am strong and got past all that, am now married to a man who believes in me having my own say and decisions in this marriage. I also have 3 children who I try my hardest to give a normal and loving family life. My husband is currently in school to earn a degree and will be done this spring, and then this fall will be my turn. I am determined to show them ( my parents) that I can and will make something of myself. I will never forgive my parents for the way they have treated and continue to treat me, like I have some plague or something. I just found out that my dad has a brain tumor, probably not much time left, and I don't even feel sad. And I think that's sad, I have removed myself so far from them that I have as much pity for them as I would a stranger. I know I need counseling for that, but am trying to heal myself instead.

    It's been great talking to everyone on here, you're like family. It's nice to know I'm not alone with my problems and quirks from the way I was raised!
    Heather

  • Sparkplug
    Sparkplug

    Heatherg. I did the same..jump in and no intro really. At least you did one. Your story sound a lot like mine. So if I can type fast enough let me be the first to say welcome!!

  • Neo
    Neo

    (((heatherg)))

  • Aude_Sapere
    Aude_Sapere

    A formal WELCOME !

    to a formal intro!!

    Glad you are here with us.

    -Aude.

  • Whiskeyjack
    Whiskeyjack

    Hi Heather,

    Thanks for the intro. I seem to have been luckier than most folks here on the board.

    Hey, we ex-Jw's all over the place...

    W.

  • heatherg
    heatherg

    Thanks for the welcome! hg

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41

    Hey, Heatherg, welcome! I wish I'd had your insight when I was your age...........god.........I was 42 before I got out! I think of all those young years wasted serving a useless organization...........

    Terri

  • seeitallclearlynow
    seeitallclearlynow

    Hi Heather, and a big official welcome! It's great having you here. I'm so glad your little ones are getting a normal, loving, non-weird upbringing!

    I will never forgive my parents for the way they have treated and continue to treat me, like I have some plague or something. I just found out that my dad has a brain tumor, probably not much time left, and I don't even feel sad. And I think that's sad, I have removed myself so far from them that I have as much pity for them as I would a stranger.

    Same here when my dad died, none of us adults kids felt any sadness...but we all had forgiven him individually. It felt good to let go of that, but the circumstances were quite different from yours.

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