My latest Live Journal post.

by ColdRedRain 2 Replies latest jw friends

  • ColdRedRain

    I am 23 years old. For 21 years, I have shut my brain out from the most beautiful of things. I never knew the beauty of books by Carl Sagan. I never knew the beauty of nature's evolution. I had to hide my music. Deicide, A Perfect Circle, Nirvana, A Perfect Circle, Inkubs Sukkubus, Bauhaus, they were all considered "Not music for spiritual people" because "alternative" music was a gateway to feelings that shouldn't be felt by Christians.


    Thoughtcrimes: There were many things wrong that I saw with the org. Their books were written in a way that attacked other veiwpoints instead of using facts. They taught faulty science and history. Not to mention that a certian video was bad, but then you really couldn't say in public that the video looked bad, or else you'll be "questioning the brother's work". For god's sake, the video looks like you're looking a Picasso while drunk.

    It claimed to "follow Jesus'" words, yet you had to dress a certian way in order to be considered "one of god's flock", ignoring the scripture that says "He is the one that is a Jew on the inside.". And the major one. You cannot question the organization or else you're disfellowshipped. Major thoughtcrime.

    When I saw my elders' response to the child molestation scandal in a nearby town, where they accused the person of lying without even considering what went on, that was the last straw.

    I will be 24 years old in 6 months. I am free, but my freedom is limited, due to the fact that I have only a lifetime to enjoy it. 1/4th of that life has already been stolen by Them.

    I was fooled into thinking I would live forever since childhood. That gave me a lazy attitude towards my life. I didn't want to learn alot, but rather put my efforts into going to people's houses and giving them tracts that they would most likley, throw away. I wanted to learn, but to go to college was seen as me not putting faith into god's promise of armageddon coming soon. I still had that fear.

    I'm now 23 years old, and I'm catching up on 3 years of fear and 2 years of greif.

    I won't graduate college until i'm 28 years old. Thank you for stealing my youth.

  • ColdRedRain
  • JustTickledPink

    The thing is you're young. It's a good thing you're 23, you have a whole life ahead of you. If you were 63, then you'd really be in bad shape.

    I left when I was 20 and I had a lot of catching up to do.. and I did. I still attend college because I can only go part time. I will finish, and you will too. Don't be too bitter, because at least you have proof that you are intelligent and can lead an information enriched life, you're not a blind follower, you are willing to question, you are willing to learn. Your childhood is always dictated by your parents/caregiver. You've become an adult now, so it is your responsibility to make the right decisions for your life. You have plenty of time to do it!

    Congratulations on not letting your mind rot, I am a firm believer in education. You will do great in life. Check back in another 23 years and let me know where you are by then!

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