"Pushing 30"

by zanex 6 Replies latest jw friends

  • zanex

    Only a few more months to go and I will cross over into the 30 and over club. THere are some things I have learned along the way...the jws will never go away....the confusion of being an xjw never goes away...parenting is so much different without the jw component...sometimes my 3 yr old daughter is the wisest person I know, as childish as that sounds...Xmas starts to finally make sense, through her eyes...birthdays finally start to have meaning with each new year adding onto the experience of the year before...

    I also have finally gleamed something rather painful as well...I will never really have my parents back as the way it used to be. I think that I have finally come to more of a grip with that. I have tried to contact my mother to no avail as the only contact I am allowed to have with her is through my father or if I have my daughter with me. I have come to terms with that. Or at least as much as I am able to come to terms with that. 30, damn, who would have thought Ida made it this far. I am disfellowshipped but I am free...I had a lot of friends who fell and were df'd and some didnt make it and some went back to the thing that they knew and became jws again. I have been down, homeless, broke, starving, strung out, wrung out and rail thin but I am not there anymore. I have worldly people, family, friends, coworkers that helped and a strong sense of self preservation.

    30...hmph...wonder what the next 25 years holds for me...I think that I will have earned the rights to be somewhat at peace and somewhat stable. 30...wow I actually made it...more or less...not til april but for the most part I have lasted longer than I anticipated...(chuckles)

    30 years around this planet

    just kicking around in and out

    stuck in a jw box for 17 or em

    spent the remainder living balls out

    survived..made it this far...

    must be doing somethin right

    maybe I got some got some good karma

    to guide my life in flight

    those coins I gave the homeless guy

    the burger you gave to that kid

    all the little things in life count

    to some end of what you did

    I've done 30 years coming up on

    and life's been up and around

    but im still here...you hear ME

    course not..jw's never hear the train sound...



  • kls

    It sounds like you have your life in order and yes the cult will still affect your life like it does so many ,me included. The next 25 or so years will be what you make of it but you have beaten the wt so it can only get better from here.

  • Stefanie

    30 years around this planet

    just kicking around in and out

    stuck in a jw box for 17 or em

    Sounds like me...

  • franklin J
    franklin J

    sounds like you have developed a strong support network with new friends and coworkers.

    Keep your head up and think positively; the next 25 years will be everything you want them to be.

    been there too,


  • Mulan

    Congratulations, you are about half my age.

    Wish I could go back. I remember turning 30 and thinking I wasn't young anymore.

  • hillbilly

    I have socks that are older than you......what's your point?

    ------Hill ( live like you stole it man)

  • BrendaCloutier

    Hey, hon, you're just a pup. You're passing the confused 20's, and entering a time when you have some knowledge and some wisdom, but aren't quite sure what to do with it.

    Enjoy your life. Enjoy your child. Just ENJOY and help others to enjoy, too. Pass It On!

    Remember, the bad stuff that comes along? It will pass, thank Gawd!. The good stuff? It will pass, too, dammit. So hang onto the good stuff as long as you can, and know that it will return.

    Hugs and peace


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