Ozzie's Weekend Poll #112 How severe are shunning acts?

by ozziepost 6 Replies latest jw friends

  • ozziepost

    G'day all,

    How's it going for you right now? Is the weekend a welcome respite from the past week? In many ways I guess that can be true. We've been anxious for news of Steve and Joy and getting news from them that they survived, even if somewhat damaged, is welcome news indeed! Eman continues to slowly recover and.....well, we have a lot to be thankful for! But many don't, do they?

    This weekend I think of those who've been abused by the Borg's use of shunning and all that entails and so we'll give some thought to that in this weekend's poll.

    Shunning can take many forms, ranging from eyes lowered to outright violence. In case you're wondering, I've had a so-called "respectable" elder (he served as a Service Overseer) physically push into me and knocked me down. My crime? I simply said "Hello"!

    How about you?

    This weekend's poll question is:

    What's the most severe shunning practice you've experienced?

    1. Eyes lowered when meeting.

    2. Stole my witnessing bag!

    3. An angry scowl.

    4. An abusive comment.

    5. Physical attack.

    6. They refused to say "Owyergoin?"

    7. Smiled back.

    8. Stole my children.

    9. Drove their shopping trolley into mine in the supermarket.

    10. Turned their back.

    11. Crossed the road.

    12. Never had any shunning. (I live on a desert island.)

    13. Other (please detail)

    So there we have it. Care to share? We're looking forward to reading your responses.

    So settle down with a nice drink and........


    Cheers, Ozzie

  • czarofmischief

    13) My pop called me one day about six months after I'd been diffed and asked me to never call the house again. If I needed to contact them about business, then I was going to have to call him on his cel phone.

    Did you ever see Dune? Where the Baron pulls that thing out of the boy's chest and he bleeds to death? I felt like that boy.

    Of course, I won that one. I built a life without my family and they came back to me!


  • new light
    new light

    I was excluded from all family functions for the nine years I was DFed. My sister's graduation, many cousins' weddings, family reunions, etc. The only event anyone had the decency to invite me to was my grandfather's funeral....yippee, what a joyful occasion. The shunning is very thorough when the family buys into the WTS philosophy. Now that I have been "inactive" for a while and they realize I'm not coming back, it's slowly beginning again. Oh well. Who needs 'em? The best revenge is to be happy without conforming to the passive-agressive pressure. It's good to be free.

  • Mulan
    13. Other (please detail)

    I am invisible. I sometimes greet them, and they act like they are deaf and I am not there.

    Most of them say "hello" though. We aren't df'd, so technically they CAN greet us, but many of them don't.

  • candidlynuts

    13.. other..

    not me but my ex when he was df'd. was the first on the scene to a motorcycle accident. tried to wave down the next car that came down the road. it was his bro and sis in law and they stared him in the eye and drove on. not stopping to see if it was him, our kids, or who was hurt. cold callous and borderline illegal in my opinion.

  • kwintestal

    Wow, that is extreme Candidly.

    Although I'm not DF'd currently, I'm ignored quite often by JW's. I make sure everytime it happens, that I mention it to my wife (who's still in) and then go on about the "love in the cong." and how they're really encouraging me to come back just like the prodical son (sarcasm is intended).


  • orangefatcat

    Hello Ozzie.


    I have had only contact once with my mother as she was hosptilized and my aunt who is not a jw told me otherwise they would have not said anything.

    I ve been out since Dec. 1999.

    Most jw I have met up face to face with say hello or smile and some talk to me. A couple of weeks ago I was in the Mall in our town and JW and her son walked right towards me and started taking. Asking me how my mother and s isters were. When i told her I didn't know as they no longer associate with me as I am disfellowshipped. Well you think that they had committed the worst sin ever . One minute I was fine to chat with and then instantly they became Hydes. I laughed when they passed me as I was on my electric scooter and so they looked down to speak with me and I thought they must be blind as I where a crucifix around my neck. I just had to chuckle.

    One ex elder looked at me with such digust that you thought I had murdered someone. (not to long after this encounter I found out he was removed as an elder because he was abusing physically his dear grandmother. she is a lovely lady. I wish he had got disfellowshipped but only demoted.)

    One sister I met in a store that sells arts and crafts and it was Christmas last yr. and I had a lot of Christmas things in my cart, Buy it didn't stop her from talking to me. She told me she has no real friends inthe congregation. She and her family at home hardly ever go to the meetings. I just found out she has ovarain cancer that has spread and she wishes to see my girlfriend and I as we were all friends years ago. She is lonely and very unhappy and wants out. the only thing that she said that stops her is that her oldest son is a pioneer in Halifax with his wife. I told her, your son lives his life and he is no longer a part of you and you need to pick up your life and be happy and if that means disfellowshipping, let it be, becasue in the long run you will have many new friends. I told her I would gladly be her friend whenever she needed to talk to me. I pray she leaves and gets in a little happiness as her life is now in the balance. I can't begin to grasp her pain, between her family and herself and her own happiness.

    I have also spoke briefly with other Jw and they don't care if I am disfellowshipped. Many think it is wrong. That the society is wrong in their judgement.

    So me I think that basically JW in general are not for disfellowshipping. But are fearful of consquenses that would result if seen talking to a df person

    So sad, but at least I am free......freee.......free


Share this