I may be wrong about JWs!

by baysixforme 7 Replies latest jw friends

  • baysixforme
    baysixforme

    As I have a court case being prepared with regards to my soon-to-be-ex-husband...I have been considering several options concerning who could be my'witnesses' to the horrific lifestyle that he subjected us to.

    One thing for certain is that an elder from my old congregation was very much aware of the despicable acts that my then husband bestowed upon myself and my children. He would come around on a weekly basis, get the low down on recent events and endeavour to counsel my husband.

    That seems to be a long time ago.......but after a solicitors appointment yesterday afternoon, it appears that I may need to recall witnesses from that particular period in our lives to verify my side of the story!

    I started thinking, and although there weren't many that knew of our situation (because we were told not to broadcast it), I knew that certainly, said elder would remember very well.

    After some consideration, I rang him, left a message and eventually he contacted me. I told him my purpose for ringing and half expected him to back down and give me some excuse like "bringing reproach upon jehovahs name/organisation" etc.

    Well, knock me down with a feather! he started to ponder and after a couple of jogs to his memory as to what had gone on before, he agreed to put pen to paper and get something in writing for me to present to the court!

    How about that? He will contact me shortly to do so!

    I have been totally shocked by his reaction. Has there been some 'new light' shed on domestic violence? Or is my old cong deparate to get people back? I'm confused?!?!?!?!?!

  • czarofmischief
    czarofmischief

    Here's the deal:

    Many JW's are actually decent enough people. It's the borg that twists them into unnatural positions; like concealing child abuse, etc. The borg gives such confusing, contradictory, impractical advice that many of these otherwise decent people wind up doing horrible things, or being party to horrible things.

    But I'm getting a real sense that the borg's grip is slipping on the mind of the average dub. They just don't have the insane control that they did before.

    CZAR

  • Markfromcali
    Markfromcali

    It just means people don't fit neatly into the boxes we have created in our heads. It's just one person, when you're talking about JWs it's just generally as a group. Clearly individuals will vary as to their attitude, that there are both ex and active JWs here on this board is proof of that.

  • maybesbabies
    maybesbabies

    Maybe he just grew a conscience??? I don't know about a new light, but I just wanted to send you my best, and I hope all goes well with you!!! ((((baysix))))

  • Elsewhere
    Elsewhere

    Unfortunately the WTS (or your husband's lawyers) might remind the elder about clergy privilege by threatening to sue him.

    Something you can ask your lawyer... since the discussions included both you and your husband, can you wave your right to clergy privilege and give the elder 100% freedom to discuss everything said, or does your husband also have to wave the privilege?

  • Jim_TX
    Jim_TX

    There's a saying here in the states that goes...

    "Don't count your chickens before they hatch."

    Translated to your situation - please don't get your hopes up - he may think about what he has to actually write, and decide not to.

    Please post if he _does_ give you something in writing. That would truly be a good thing.

    Good luck on your court case.

    Regards,

    Jim TX

  • Flash
    Flash
    I'm confused?!?!?!?!?!

    He may be doing the right thing just because it's right. It may be too that he's looking to avoid a court appearance. Ask him to noterize it, it'll authenticate his remarks and carry more weight in court.

  • baysixforme
    baysixforme

    Thought that I might add that this was actually the last conversation that I had with this particular Elder and his wife...http://www.jehovahs-witness.com/6/58007/1.ashx and this happened about a year ago, I have not seen him since. Perhaps there was something in the things that I said to him that made him think he owed me something?

    Bay64me

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