RE: Post - WT relationships

by TallTexan 4 Replies latest jw experiences

  • TallTexan
    TallTexan

    Have any of you found that it's more difficult to have normal relationships after you've left? I seem to know a lot of ex-JW's (myself included) who tend to fall into these co-dependent relationships. It's almost like we're trying to replace the control and turmoil of the WT w/ a bad relationship....lol. I don't know. I just got out of a rocky relationship of a year and feel bad - similar to how I felt when I decided to leave the 'truth'. Add that mental conditioning to the fact that, especially for those of us raised in the truth, birthdays and holidays mean nothing and we're all screwed up spiritually and it just seems more difficult. Maybe it's just me...lol. I am kind of an a-hole.....

  • ohiocowboy
    ohiocowboy

    Yes, I definately had problems keeping a relationship. Things seemed to go fairly normal for a time, but when they found out that I used to be a JW, they usually ran. And, as you mentioned, the Holidays and such were new for me, and it would cause problems, as I still had the guilt thing going on. It has been better the past couple of years, as I am starting to fit more in the "World", and using my brain to think along those lines, rather than thinking of how I would have handled things while in the Org.

  • Lehaa
    Lehaa
    who tend to fall into these co-dependent relationships. It's almost like we're trying to replace the control and turmoil of the WT w/ a bad relationship....lol

    Definately. Had a disastrous one when I decided to leave. Was like I was trying to replace the organsation with him. He ran, and I don't blame him.

    We've since caught up, sorted stuff out and are great friends again.

    I've decided to swear off all romantic relationships for at least 12 months.

  • KIANAMARIE
    KIANAMARIE

    YES I'D SAY IT IS DIFFICULT TO TRY AND FIND SOMEONE WHO THINKS AS U DO AFTER U LEAVE THE TRUTH... I STILL HAVE THE SAME BELIEFS AND I DON'T CARE MUCH FOR HOLIDAYS. .BUT THEY DO. AND THAT CAUSES PROBLEMS IN RELATIONSHIPS..

    I HAVE TRIED TO FIND SOMEONE SIMILAR LIKE ME THAT HAS THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE TRUTH BUT YET NOT ACTIVE.. AND GO FROM THERE.. BUT I CAN'T SEEM TO GET THERE.

  • wednesday
    wednesday

    TT,

    look back over Lady lees' posts. She has a thread currently called something like 3 yrs on JWD. In it she has a links to her best posts.several are related to relationshios and such.

    U may find someone here, while not a dating service, several relationships and marriages have been spawned from here.

    Good luck,

    weds

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