A very revealing dream I've had!

logansrun

What would Sigi say about this:

You all know, of course, that I'm an ex-JW (duh) and that breaking away was extremely gut-wrenching. My brother-in-law was one of my primary "mentors" in the Troof as well as being ten years older than me. I looked up to him. He was a spritual "father" of sorts. He also is the person who told me, when he found out that I was going to leave Watchtowerland, "I want you and all of your things out of my house, and I never want to speak to your sister again." (I was watching his house at the time they were in Bethel. He told this to me over the phone)

Some of you also know that my relationship with my father was not the greatest. He was extremely neurotic and I always felt that I had to overcome his problems in my life. (My parents divorced when I was 19)

So, here's my dream. I was arguing with my brother-in-law about the JWs and it was becoming extremely heated. I actually felt violent anger towards him. (In other dreams I've had I physically assault the man) Well, as I'm arguing with Tom (my b-i-l) his voice changes and it becomes....you guessed it...the voice of my father. Woah.

In my interpretation, the two greatest obstacles in my life -- my father/his impact on my life and the totality of the WT experience -- blended into one entity at that point.

I've been having other strage dreams of late as well. In fact, for the first time in my life I actually woke up screaming about a month ago. It has happened on another occassion as well. I immediately get up and seem unaware of my surroundings. I cannot say what I was dreaming about at the time though.

B.

logansrun

On another occassion I was in a half-dream state thinking about my mother (another figure that I've had issues with; especially about the JWs) and I said audibly, with no delay between what I was thinking and what I said, "What have I to do with you, woman?"

I'm developing a Christ complex!

shotgun

Logan

The dream has a double meaning...first..there will be seven years of sexual famine in your home and then...well actually that's it.

Seriously...keeping a notepad close to your bed so that you can write down what you remember when you wake up lets you look back over it, seems like you have the interpretation of that dream figured out and it sounds reasonable as well.

BTW I sold my dream recollections to Hustler magazine...ok so I paid them to take them...alright already, so what if they made them into a cartoon, it was a dirty cartoon.

logansrun

Shotgun,

The funny thing is I've rarely had sexual dreams in my life. Strange, huh? Well, except that one time that I was dreaming about sex and I could actually FEEL it. I wish that happened more often.

Oh well.

I don't believe all dreams are significant, though. Some are just random and senseless; a churning of the brain for no apparrant reason. The WT/brother-in-law/father dream was just too much, though. I'm certain my unconscious was involved in manipulating the symbols.

B.

Country Girl

It sounds to me, Bradley, that your mind was telling you that you have sublimated anger at both of these role figures in your life, and you are releasing this anger through your dreams because of your normally controlled and calm nature. Your mind is expressing anger at what it feels as betrayal: 1) that you had to live a certain way to make these gentlemen happy, and couldn't feel free to be true to your own nature; 2) that everything they believed, they made you believe through your awe of them as role models, and it's all turned out to be a lie; and 3) that everything was conditional.

I think a good thing for you would be to write your feelings out on paper, i.e., a letter to each of these people expressing the anger and betrayal you've felt. You don't have to send it, but sometimes writing this stuff out relieves a lot of pressure. Believe me, I have written LOTS of letters to my ex-husband in my time, and it does seem to help.

I had a dream about a slasher last night. Almost like Friday the 13th, only he was after *me*. Now, wasn't *that fun* to wake up to!

CG

Country Girl

This is my attempt at arm-chair psychiatry. It might sound bogus.. but take what ya want and leave the rest.

It sounds, Bradley, that your mind is responding to sublimated anger against these two individuals. It seems as if you are suppressing anger toward these individuals, and your mind is releasing the anger n your dreams because of your normally calm and controlled nature, and your inability to express it in the real world? It sounds like issues of betrayal: 1) because of conditions put on their love and support, you were forced to suppress your own true nature and were not free to express yourself individually; 2) everything they taught you as adult male role models you have found to be a lie; and 3) your realization about their fallibility.

It always helps to write letters to individuals you feel some anger against. You don't mail them, but writing these feelings out can help relieve some of these feelings and dreams. Believe me, I have more letters to my ex-husband that you can shake a stick at. Whatever that means.. I believe it did help me quite a bit to work through confusing and angry feelings.

Your friend,

Country <asking you to stretch out on the couch> Girl