Hubby has been doing research on the internet!!!!

by atacrossroads 39 Replies latest jw friends

  • Billy the Ex-Bethelite
    Billy the Ex-Bethelite

    He said he was tired of the do more mentality of the witnesses. I was shocked when that came out of his mouth. He said nothing he did was ever enough and his father considers him a complete failure. He said that since he resigned as a MS it has allowed him to pursue other interests and he has enjoyed the freedom.

    I was good at acting happy as a JW. But I never really knew anything close to happiness until I moved away and stopped attending and wasting my life on Watchtower.

    I wish you both the best of luck on your escape from the cult and in coping with your extended families.

  • baltar447
    baltar447

    Reading this made me smile. I'm very happy for you, and hope that you guys come out of this together.

  • dubstepped
    dubstepped
    I'm very happy for both of you. The performance oriented nature of the organization and the absence of real love were keys in waking me up. I realized how cold and calloused the Borg were and how absolute they expected your assimilation to be lest you be ostracized as an apostate. They are slow to love, quick to shun. They just don't reflect the qualities of the one they claim to imitate, Jesus. I think it's great that he is taking time to research things for himself and to come to his own conclusions. It is the toughest thing I've ever had to do mentally, to break through strongly entrenched indoctrination, but the freedom is amazing afterward.
  • chicken little
    chicken little

    When I woke up I gave my husband time to find out what he would do. He took two weeks and then told me he was finished with the religion. He was a very active elder at the time. It was a shock but I knew he loved me more than the religion.

    Go slow, respect what he said and be happy around him.

  • Oubliette
    Oubliette

    atacrossroads: he is no longer sure the witnesses have the truth.

    This is fantastic news!

  • Lostwun
    Lostwun

    I'm happy for you ata.

    This is very positive news to hear and I really hope in the end that he wakes up fully with you.

    Hugs

    Lostwun

  • TheListener
    TheListener
    Great news!!! I hope it all works out for the best.
  • FayeDunaway
    FayeDunaway
    I actually don't think this could go either way, especially if you take the advice of recommending Jwfacts over most of the other sites. And then leave him alone about it for a good while. You might ask how he's doing but leave it there until he's ready to talk at length about what he's learned. This news is SO amazing!!
  • goingthruthemotions
    goingthruthemotions
    bravo!!!!!!!!!! i wish mine would go the same...things for me just keep getting worse and worse.
  • atacrossroads
    atacrossroads

    Thank you all so much for your support! So hubby skipped the meeting yesterday and he left his cell phone at home. We went hiking in the morning and took some really nice pictures. When we got back there was a note on the door from his parents to let him know they stopped by and to please call them. He had 11 missed calls from his dad and only 1 text that said "where are you"?

    We then went to the lunch and saw the movie The Last Witch Hunter. Never ever would he have seen a movie like this before. He is really stepping out of his comfort zone. As a side note the movie was really not that good. If you want to see it wait for it to come out at the red box.

    He said that he needs to tell his parents he will no longer be attending meetings but wants to delay it for the time being. I can tell he has a lot of anxiety over having that conversation. He asked for space while he does his research on the JW's but I asked him what triggered him to start looking on the internet. He said he has put his head in the sand for years and he can't do it anymore. He did not get really specific. I let it go but told him when he was ready to talk to let me know.

    His close friend an uber elder in another congregation invited him to go out in field service this week. Hubby responded he had to work. Then he asked him how about the weekend. He said he would be out of town which is sort of true. lol Why does it always have to be JW related? Can't you just go have a drink without having to go in fs first??

    The elders have left me alone for the most part but I don't think it will be like that for him. I don't think they will leave him in peace. I was left alone because he told them to leave me alone but that was when he was still attending meetings. Next few weeks should prove to be interesting.

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