*fluff* very cute

by fader 5 Replies latest jw friends

  • fader

    My mom, a JW, sent this to me. Some of these are kind of cute.


    3-year-old, Reese: "Our Father, Who does art in
    heaven, Harold is His name." " Amen"
    A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if you
    can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm
    having a real good time like I am."
    A Sunday school class was studying the Ten
    Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one.
    The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it
    was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,
    "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's
    After the christening of his baby brother in church,
    Jason sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the
    car. His father asked him three times what was wrong.
    Finally, the boy replied, "That preacher said he
    wanted us brought up in a Christian home, and I wanted
    to stay with you guys."
    I had been teaching my three-year old daughter,
    Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for several evenings at
    bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the
    prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened
    with pride as she carefully enunciated each word,
    right up to the end of the prayer: "Lead us not into
    temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail.
    ..and one particular four-year-old prayed, "And
    forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who
    put trash in our baskets."
    A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they
    were on the way to church service, "And why is it
    necessary to be quiet in church? One bright little
    girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."
    Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel
    were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang,
    and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had
    enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in
    church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked.
    Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See
    those two men standing by the door?
    They're hushers."
    A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin,
    5, Ryan,3. The boys began to argue over who would get
    the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity
    for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He
    would say, 'Let my brother have the
    first pancake, I can wait.'" Kevin turned to his
    younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus!"
    A father was at the beach with his children when the
    four-year-old son ran up to him, grabbed his hand, and
    led him to the shore, where a seagull lay dead in the
    sand. "Daddy, what happened to him?" the son asked.
    "He died and went to Heaven," the Dad replied. The boy
    thought then said, "Did God throw him back down?"
    A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table,
    she turned to their six-year-old daughter - "Would you
    like to say the blessing?" "I wouldn't know what to
    say," the girl replied. "Just say what you hear Mommy
    say," the wife answered. The daughter bowed her head
    and said, "Lord, why on earth did I invite all these
    people to dinner?"
    It was Palm Sunday and, because of a sore throat,
    five-year-old Johnny stayed home from church with a
    sitter. When the family returned home, they were
    carrying several palm branches. The boy asked what
    they were for. "People held them over Jesus' head as
    he walked by," his older brother explained.
    "Wouldn't you know it," the boy fumed. "The one Sunday
    I don't go, He showed up!"

    One Easter Sunday morning as the minister was
    preaching the children's sermon, he reached into his
    bag of props and pulled out an egg. He pointed at the
    egg and asked the children, "What's in here?"
    "I know!" a little boy! exclaimed. "Pantyhose!"

    The prospective father-in-law asked, "Young man, can
    you support a family?"
    The surprised groom-to-be replied, "Well, no. I was
    just planning to support your daughter. The rest of
    you will have to fend for yourselves."

    A little boy in church for the first time watched as
    the ushers passed around the offering plates. When
    they came near his pew, the boy said loudly, "Don't
    pay for me Daddy. I'm under five."

    During my brother's wedding, my mother managed to keep
    from crying until she glanced at my grandparents. My
    grandmother had reached over to my grandfather's
    wheelchair and gently touched his hand. That was all
    it took to start my mother's tears flowing.
    After the wedding, Mom went over to my grandmother and
    told her How that tender gesture triggered her
    outburst. "Well, I'm sorry to ruin your moment,"
    Grandmother replied, "but I was just checking to see
    if he was still alive."

    "Oh, I sure am happy to see you," the little boy said
    to his grandmother on his mother's side. "Now maybe
    Daddy will do the trick he has been promising us."
    The grandmother was curious. "What trick is that?" she
    "I heard him tell Mommy," the little boy answered,
    "that he would climb the walls if you came to visit."

  • dustyb

    A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they
    were on the way to church service, "And why is it
    necessary to be quiet in church? One bright little
    girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

    hehehehehe, thats me(i've said that a few times at KH)

  • Englishman

    A small boy is burying his dead goldfish in a hole in the garden:

    "In the name of the Father,

    in the name of the Son,

    and into the hole he goes."


  • franklin J
    franklin J

    I love it!

    Those of us with small kids can relate well to this!

  • simplesally
    "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail."

    It's funny what they think they hear!

  • Carmel

    Time to make up some comparable satirical stuff about JW kids and what they get out of the boring crap that goes down as "spiritual food" at the KH!


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